Detour
by Jessa4865
Summary: The Long Awaited Sequel to True Happiness. COMPLETE!
1. Prologue

Detour (or The Long Awaited Sequel to True Happiness)

jessa4865

Spoilers: Anything's possible through 7th season eps and, naturally, True Happiness. Some of this won't make sense if you haven't read that, but most of it probably will.

Disclaimer: I don't own them; I'm just taking them out for some fun. I'll put them back when I'm done. Promise.

AN: Takes place somewhere in season 7, but not particularly anywhere. SJ… always

Prologue

The phone in Samantha Carter's lab rang just as she was heading out. She'd only meant to stop in for a moment, long enough to make sure nothing was left out that could possibly go bad while she was having lunch or disappearing inexplicably after lunch. Colonel O'Neill was waiting for her in the mess and she didn't want to keep him waiting. She sighed as she made her way back to her desk, laughing to herself at her own stupidity – of course he wouldn't wait on her if there was food in front of him. The man did have priorities.

She lifted the phone to her ear and prayed that there wouldn't be a crisis unfolding on the other end when she identified herself. "Carter."

"It's Taco day."

His words made her smile, making her feel a little better that he couldn't wait five minutes for her to return and had to call her in the meantime. "Yes, sir, it's Wednesday. There are always tacos on Wednesdays."

"I love Wednesdays." He sounded truly pleased.

She was still smiling into the phone like an idiot. "Yes, sir, I'm starting to feel a certain affection for them as well." He was quiet after she spoke and she feared for a moment that her allusion to what had just transpired between them was too forward. She blushed deeply, something she'd been doing far too often anymore.

But she could hear the smile in his voice. "I can understand that. Could you do me a favor and grab my hot sauce? You know the mess doesn't have anything resembling hot sauce."

"Actually, sir, they do. It's the red stuff in those little bottles that are labeled 'hot sauce.'" She couldn't help being flippant. She was just in too good a mood.

"Carter!"

"Yes, sir, I'll get it." She knew the colonel preferred his hot sauce unbearably so and had only ever been satisfied by an odd substance Teal'c had found for him. The smell alone was enough to clear Carter's sinuses and she stayed far away from the stuff. But she knew that the colonel would not eat his tacos without it. And she wasn't quite able to deny him anything.

"Hurry up, Carter."

"I can't get it until I get off the phone, sir. I would, however, like to take this opportunity to point out that I seriously doubt you're going to starve before I get there."

"I'm not starving. I miss you." How could she resist that?

"I'll be right there, sir." She giggled as she hung up, practically skipping to the locker room and finding the two small vials in his jacket pocket. He carried that hot sauce with him everywhere he went and so it always had to be in his uniform. And apparently, she noted, he'd taken to carrying back up. She picked the fuller of the two jars and headed back to the elevators.

It was only a few minutes later that Carter about floated into the mess, sitting down at the table that had two trays on it. The colonel's face lit up when he saw her, but she realized his glee was directed at the substance in her hand and not necessarily at her. She shook her head as he snagged the bottle from her, carefully allowing a scant few drops to fall into his food.

She couldn't quite force back a grin as she feigned innocence. "You do realize that it will be several days before any woman in her right mind would kiss you after eating that stuff, right?"

He winked at her as he dug into his food. "Guess it's a good thing you're not exactly in your right mind then, huh?"

Stunned by his boldness, she felt her face color once again and she dropped her head, busying herself with applying her own mild sauce to her food. When she looked up again, Jack was once again putting the hot sauce on his lunch – liberally. He held it out to her.

"This doesn't seem that hot to me." He waved it under her nose, but she jerked out of the way.

Her eyes had already started to tear, just knowing it was in front of her. "Don't you dare. Keep that away from me."

She watched in horror as he stuck his finger directly into the small jar, then brought the finger to lips and licked it. But she got distracted at the sight of his tongue and as a result, it barely even registered that he was entirely disappointed by the taste. He dumped the bottle upside down and shrugged.

"Maybe the potency wears off after a little while."

Still transfixed by the workings of his mouth, a mouth she'd had the glorious privilege of tasting just a few minutes earlier, she only nodded in response. She seriously doubted the potency of that would ever quite wear off. Her eyes lifted to his across the table and found that his face was red too. She knew it had nothing to do with the food. She suspected it had something to do with the way his leg had wormed its way between hers and was pressing against her calf. It wasn't the most intimate contact in the world, but in the mess, in uniform, in front of witnesses, it was pretty damn forward.

Her face was still burning several minutes later when Daniel happened upon them.

"Hey, guys." He looked around suspiciously. "Am I interrupting something?"

Belatedly, Carter noticed that all heads in the mess had turned in their direction. "No, Daniel, not a thing." Certainly not lunch, she realized, because neither of them had managed to stop staring at one another long enough to take more than a bite, which might have explained the audience. She shifted her leg out of contact with Jack's and found that the temperature in the room dropped back to something resembling normal. "What's up?"

Daniel turned to Jack, who was practically shoveling food into his mouth since he was no longer distracted by Carter. Daniel grimaced at the image. "Jack, General Hammond asked if we still had that sample from 738."

He talked around the massive amount of food in his mouth. "What sample from where?"

"Jack, how often are you responsible for carrying the samples from anywhere?" Daniel's words reminded Jack immediately that there was only one thing he'd been carrying and that was because he'd been the one to obtain it.

"You mean Loh'ran's mini-me potion?"

Daniel rolled his eyes. "Yes, Jack, that sample."

"It's in my locker."

"Ok, I'll go get it." Daniel smiled at Carter. "I'll catch up with you later."

Jack stood up quickly, forgetting entirely about his food and his companion. "No way, Danny boy. God knows what'll happen if you get your hands on it."

He stopped before he took two steps and looked at Carter. "I'll see you later?"

Carter smiled. "Count on it, sir."

It never occurred to her, despite all the fuss when the colonel was unable to locate the sample, nor when, subsequently, everyone was unable to locate the colonel, that it had anything to do with the lack of flavor from Jack's precious hot sauce or that she'd grabbed the wrong bottle.

_AN: Comments are greatly appreciated!_


	2. Chapter One

_AN: Thanks for the comments! Please keep them coming! _

Chapter One  
A few hours earlier

You know, I've always been confident. Blame it on my dad. I'll never forget that day when I was almost three when I tied my own shoes for the first time. Hell, my older brother wasn't even tying his shoes yet, but there I was, having taught myself something important. My father made the hugest fuss over me for that. I remember the way he squatted down in front of me and gave me a tight hug and then put his hands on my shoulders and told me that I was the smartest person in all the world. I believed him. He was my dad. Would he lie? Of course not. So by the time I was three, I was fairly certain that there was nothing in the world I couldn't do.

Thirty some years of believing it has resulted in my actually proving on several occasions that, if not the smartest, I am damn near close to being the smartest person on Earth. I've made rearranging the laws of physics to suit my needs my own personal quest. And let's not forget the sun – the one that I blew up – because I'm that good. Most people would not endeavor to blow up a sun and few of those that did would actually be able to do it. But I did.

I try to be modest and I succeed for the most part. And when I don't, I fall back on the dimples. Because they always worked on dad too. I'm cute. It's a fact. I don't often use it to my advantage, but I'll admit, there have been a few times that I have – like when I was in school and a little short on cash when I'd bat my eyelashes at some unsuspecting teenage clerk who would blush furiously and let me go without paying full price.

But really, for the most part, I'm a good girl. I only use my brain for saving the world, and occasionally for fixing appliances, and I don't mercilessly quash the free will of men by exploiting my looks. The only thing that's really come out of knowing that I'm smart and pretty is the confidence that comes with knowing I could probably take over a good portion of the galaxy if I wanted. Provided of course, that I didn't have to kill anyone to do so, unless they were truly evil, and I'd have to do it without using force, because that's just wrong.

At any rate, I'm confident. When someone asks me to do something, no matter how impossible, I usually just say ok. Sometimes I'll hesitate and say it can't be done, but no one ever listens, least of all Colonel O'Neill. If I hadn't been overly confident when I met him and I'd survived that first meeting when he'd tried to shake me, he would have succeeding in doing exactly the same thing my dad had years earlier. He gets that same awed look on his face when he sees me sometimes… well it's all I can do not to be full of myself when someone as fabulous as Jack O'Neill thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread.

Unfortunately, having been confident and unflappable all my life, I suddenly find myself in a terribly awkward position around Colonel O'Neill. I can't talk to him. I'm afraid to talk to him. I'm afraid to look at him. Two weeks ago, Loh'ran's marvelous wonder drug regressed me to three years old. Which would have been fine, even as I conquered the SGC with my dimples, except that, for reasons that made perfect sense to me at the time and are unfathomable to me now, unless I'm being honest with myself, I pretty much spent the entire time I was three in Jack's arms. Or clinging to Jack. Or crying for Jack. Or professing my love for Jack. Or asking Jack to marry me.

It would have been bad enough if I didn't remember it. But I do. And although it's contrary to my nature to admit I've made a mistake, I fear this is one of those few times when I made a mistake. I never, ever should have told him that I remembered it. But I was still a little confused and my brain wasn't quite as quick as my body to transition back to adulthood and I was more than a little floored at the way Jack had been ogling me when we were in the armory and I was dressed only in his t-shirt. So I flirted with him, reminding him that he owed me a slinky.

He'd insisted on taking me to dinner. We'd gotten all dressed up and driven to a fancy restaurant that was so far out of town the only reasonable explanation for us going there was so that there would be no witnesses to the fact that we very much appeared to be on a date. I was in a great mood and he was obviously quite thrilled to have me back as a grown up. We had a fantastic time. It was hands-down the best date I've ever been on. He walked me to my door and I was a little tipsy from the wine and the adrenaline rush of such a perfect night and he smelled so great and he was smiling and so utterly handsome and I had every intention of inviting him in. And see, that's where the confidence got me in trouble. Because I was sure that he'd be putty in my hands.

His hands were on my waist and he was gazing at my mouth and I never even doubted myself for a second. I put my hands on his chest and fairly purred an invitation to stay in a voice I've never once had not work.

If he was surprised, he didn't show it. He simply leaned in like he was going to kiss me. He had to have known I thought he was going to kiss me – he was leaning, after all – and he did, in fact, kiss me. On the cheek. He smiled at me, a perfectly polite, disinterested smile that I almost slapped him over. Then he spoke.

"Night, Carter." His voice was so even and normal and nonchalant.

I'd never been so hurt or confused or surprised. But mostly, I'd never been so furious.

And I'm sure that much was clear, because his eyes widened a little – quite a revelation for Jack, really – and he backed halfway to his truck before he dared turn his back on me.

He's spent two weeks acting perfectly normal while I've spent two weeks feeling like I've completely lost my grip. I'm reeling, although I'm not sure which I'm having more trouble with – the fact that I was wrong or that fact that he was the one who proved me wrong. I realize something scary: if he's immune to my charms, then I'm exactly what he's made it so clear that he doesn't like – just a brainy scientist that gets on his nerves.

I'm suddenly acutely aware that it might not just be him that I'm wrong about – maybe it's everything. Maybe I've been an insufferable, self-centered bitch all this time without even realizing it. Maybe my place on SG-1 isn't so secure. Maybe the SGC doesn't really need me. Maybe I'm not really as smart as I've always thought. And I just can't get over the fact that I threw myself at him – my CO – and he wasn't tempted, not even for a second. That was certainly the last thing I ever would have expected. Maybe I'm not even cute after all.

I drop my face into my hands. Oh, please let me die now. I think I've developed a panic disorder. Every time I hear footsteps, like I do now, I become irrationally afraid – because I'm certain it's him and I'm too mortified to face him. I tell myself that it's not him; it hasn't been him in two weeks, because for all his acting normal, he's studiously avoided me this whole time. I calm myself a little, focusing on breathing normally. I realize there are no more footsteps and I relax.

"Are you all right, Carter?"

I yelp. I jump. I clap my hands over my eyes as if somehow that will make him not be there anymore.

"Carter?" His voice is getting closer and I force myself to stop hyperventilating, if only because that will make me pass out and then, God forbid, he might actually try to catch me.

"Yes, sir. I'm fine, sir." I catch myself talking in a much higher pitch than usual and try to bring it back to normal. "You just surprised me, sir." There, that sounded normal. Ish.

He doesn't quite look convinced, but apparently, I'm not all that good at reading him as evidenced by the incident I'm trying to pretend didn't happen. After a painfully long moment, he shrugs. "What are you up to?"

"Work, sir."

"You've been doing that a lot lately."

"It is my job, sir." I know he's trying to catch my eyes, so I don't let him. "I'm really very busy, sir." I turn my attention back to my computer and come to the horrified realization that I haven't been working for a long enough time that the monitor has powered off. That couldn't possibly have escaped his notice. I feel my face burning as I flick the mouse, typing random characters to fool him. He's silent. He's staring at me. I bite my lip, reminding myself that ignoring him is the fastest way to get rid of him.

A good ten minutes later and I'm staring at seventeen pages of random characters. I pause, scanning over what I've typed as though I were really checking my work, and discover that buried within the lines of nonsense, the phrase 'go away' has appeared innumerable times. Score one for the subconscious. Unfortunately, I'm tired of pretending to type and I want to go back to staring at the wall and seriously thinking of how I can build a time machine to fix this mess I created, but I can't give up the working act now because that would be accepting defeat. Admitting that I was wrong and accepting defeat are two entirely different things. I'm trying to take one step at a time here.

So I turn to him with my most respectful, yet haughty, look. "Was there something you needed, sir?"

One side of his mouth curves up in an unbelievably sexy grin. "Why? Am I distracting you?"

My eyes involuntarily narrow the slightest bit, but I still smile. "Not at all, sir. I just know how you get bored so easily and I don't imagine you've really got nothing better to do than stand here."

Apparently he's not quite willing to accept defeat either. "Want to grab some lunch?"

"I'm not really hungry." At least it's the truth. The very thought of eating makes my stomach turn.

He pulls out a stool and sits down. "Ok."

Now I know that Jack O'Neill is a smart man. Sometimes I think he's actually smarter than me because he has the sense to hide it and playing dumb seems like such a great way to get out of things to me. So I know he's not really as unaware of what's going on in my head as he's pretending to be. And it just makes me angry.

I turn back to my computer and pound out another page of gibberish. My face is still red, though among the embarrassment and the anger and the frustration, I can't really be sure exactly which is to blame.

"Are you feeling ok, Carter?"

"Yes, sir, I'm fine." My clipped tone and angry keystrokes really should warn him off, but then again, he is doing this on purpose. I shouldn't be surprised when I feel his cool hand against my forehead, but I am and I jump back a foot. "What are you doing?"

"You look flushed. Are you coming down with something?"

"That's ridiculous, sir. I never get sick." Which is true.

"Then why are you all red?" He's smirking and I think he's just pleased that he thinks he's caught me in a lie. But then I see him turning slowly, his eyes lazily making their way to my computer.

He so cannot find out I just typed eighteen pages of 'iairubahpoiah' to avoid actually having to deal with him. That's somehow more embarrassing than trying, and failing, to seduce him. I boldly reach past him to slap the top of my laptop closed. "Come to think of it, I could go for something to eat."

His eyes remain on the now closed computer for so long I'm really afraid he's going to open it back up because he knows I'm tying to hide something and I'm doing a very bad job of trying to hide that I'm trying to hide something. But then he looks at me and the intrigue disappears behind a smile. "Let's go."

_AN2: Just for the record, before everyone freaks out :) keep in mind that it's me, guys and everything will be ok! Trust me… explanations are forthcoming!_


	3. Chapter Two

_AN: I hope this clears up the confusion. :) Please R&R!_

Chapter Two

As we step into the elevator, I decide that if it ever comes up, I'm going to pretend I was far more inebriated than I really was that night and that I don't remember a thing. But then he presses the button for the wrong floor and rather than saying something like I would have done without a second thought before I made an ass out of myself, I stand there mutely, wondering what the hell he's doing.

He inclines his head for me to follow him as he steps out. "I've got something for you."

Oh, this cannot be good.

I follow him into the locker room, saying nothing as he opens his locker. I want to hide. I want to melt into a puddle and seep through the drain in the floor. I want to not be here right now.

He turns back to me with a grin and offers me a paper bag. "This is for you."

He's being so perfectly charming that I would have treasured this time a few weeks ago, but I can't now. I feel my face burning again. He knows I've humiliated myself. He knows it, but he won't let me go off and lick my wounds. He still wants to be friends. I reach into the bag with a smile that I hope doesn't give away how nauseated I feel. When my hand closes around a small cube, I feel the bile in the back of my throat.

I clench my teeth, trying to force back the sickening feeling. I look down and find exactly what I'd feared – a brand new slinky. I'd politely thank him except I'm unable to speak and almost certain I'm going to die from shame. I don't know if that's possible, but I'm about to find out.

"I forgot to give it to you the other night." Did he have to mention it? Did had have to bring it up? Could he have possibly missed my nonverbal clues? He's never going to let me forget.

But at the same time, I know he's not that mean. He's not malicious, at least not towards me. He's smiling warmly, like he has no idea what I'm going through. And I can't imagine this is how he'd behave if he did.

He looks genuinely concerned. "Carter? Are you sure you're all right? You really don't look so good."

I thrust the slinky back into his hands and bolt for the door. I'm not going to get sick in front of him. Because that would just be more embarrassment for me to deal with later.

I make it to the ladies room and immediately sink to the floor. I need to get a grip. He's fine. He's not acting normal; he is normal. He's either forgotten, or he's trying to forget, that night and I need to do the same.

There's a knock at the door and I ignore it. Most women, at some point in their lives, have walked into a restroom and seen another woman hiding out in the midst of a personal crisis. It's just polite to suddenly remember that you hadn't meant to go in the bathroom at all and promptly walk away. I assume this will be no exception. And failing that, since I'm the highest ranking woman in the mountain, I'll just order her to leave.

But it is an exception. Because it's not some woman who walks in. It's him. He walks right in and slides down the wall to sit beside me, so close that our legs are touching. I almost whimper at how good he smells. No one should smell that good. It's not fair to the rest of us who are trying to think clearly despite a rampant attraction to the man who smells so damn good who is not attracted back.

"This is about the other night, isn't it?"

No one should ever have to hear those words.

I've accepted that I was wrong. I've accepted that I've been arrogant. Can't the torture just end now? I lean forward and rest my face against my bent knees.

His hand falls on the back of my neck and his fingers sift through my hair. It feels so wonderful and soothing and intimate and my skin is tingling from the contact. But I shouldn't like it and I won't let myself enjoy it.

"Carter, we need to talk."

Now that's another one no one should ever have to hear.

I take a deep breath and force myself to sit up. I resolve that despite how bad I feel at this moment, I'm going to hold myself together in front of him. "No, sir, really. It's fine. I'm fine."

He stares at me, holding my eyes with one of those looks that have always made me fear I'll melt. As I search his gaze, I'm absolutely baffled as to how I ever could have misinterpreted that look. I mean, I must have. I must be. I'm just not sure how it could mean anything other than him feeling the exact same way I do.

And that moment of immobile confusion is all the time he needs. He uses the leverage from his hand still being in my hair, which I hadn't realized was still there, to pull me forward, planting a kiss directly on my lips.

A fleeting eternity later, I feel his teeth nipping gently at my lip, his tongue begging for entrance. I'm powerless to resist him; I always have been. So I acquiesce.

Oh _my_.

Ok, the kiss was definitely his idea, but I made no attempt to stop him, therefore I get to share in the glory of that brilliant decision. And it was definitely brilliant because I'm seeing stars. But that might be from the lack of oxygen.

He pulls back, panting, and rests his forehead against mine. "Wow."

I giggle because I can't imagine a better time for it. "Yeah, exactly."

After a moment, he shifts his face against mine and his kisses are interspersed with his words. Kiss. "So." Kiss. "Carter." Kiss. "I was-" Kiss kiss kiss. "Trying to-" Kiss. "Say-" Kiss kiss. "Ah, fuck it." And then the kissing starts in earnest again.

It's a startled squeak by someone who might well have been Janet that finally drives us apart. Luckily, whoever it is, leaves as quickly as she came, postponing our embarrassment for whenever we find out who it actually was.

But the mood is broken nonetheless and, although we're still sitting side by side and quite close, Jack's attention is focused on his lap. "Like I was saying, Carter-"

My giggle interrupts him, but only for a moment. "I kind of preferred the way you were saying it before." I feel like I should apologize, that I should slip back into professional mode as quickly and easily as he did. But I can't. I'm too busy being happy that I haven't been misreading him for seven years. And then there's the fact that he's grinning at my joke. Jack grins are so not the way to discourage me.

"I wanted to talk to you about the other night because I was afraid you might have thought it was something you did and I didn't want you to think that." He bites his lip hard and, with a smile at my own audacity, I reach out and carefully smooth my thumb against it. He kisses my fingers lightly and I'm overwhelmed with love for this man – who is giving me enough of a glimpse of his tender side to know that it's really there. And for Jack, that's a very big deal.

He takes my hand in his, letting his surprisingly soft skin smooth over mine until our fingers interlock. "I freaked out, Carter." He turns to me, leaning his head back against the pink and white tiles, and shrugs. "It was such a perfect night and I was afraid you'd regret asking me to stay and I didn't want to ruin this."

"I did regret it." I look away because I can confide my feelings, but not if I have to look into those eyes to do it. "When you left, I thought I'd read the whole thing wrong." I dare to glance at him, ashamed to admit my insecurity, because with him here, like this, I remember why I feel so damn confident. How can I not feel confident when this man believes in me so strongly? The way he looks at me - it's like I'm God's gift to the Earth, at least as far as he's concerned.

"I know." He closes his eyes and shakes his head. "I knew you did and I felt so bad for doing that to you, but I didn't know what else to do." He shrugs again. "Like I said, I freaked out. It wasn't you."

"I thought you were avoiding me because I'd made an ass out of myself." It's easier to be honest with him when he leans over and rests his head on my shoulder.

"I was avoiding you because I'd made you feel like an ass and I was afraid you'd want to hurt me." He shifts his arm to press against mine. "You should have kicked my ass for that. I was so afraid of screwing it up that I damn near screwed it up."

I snuggle closer to him. "I thought I'd screwed it up and you were too embarrassed to look at me."

"I'm sorry." He lifts his head up, letting his lips press into my hair. "I never meant to hurt you and if I'd known that I would, I never would have left like that, and I swear, as soon as I realized you wouldn't look at me, I knew it was all my fault."

"So despite attempts by both of us to sabotage this, we're ok?"

He moves to face me, kneeling down in front of me. "Can we try it again? Pretend that other night didn't happen?"

I smile at him. "Except for the last two minutes and the two weeks that followed it, that night was perfect."

"Please, Carter? I don't want to live with the idea that I completely fucked up our first date." He moves forward and nuzzles my nose with his. "I'll beg if I have to."

Now that's something everyone should get to hear.

I'm so tempted. But who could ever tell him no? And who could argue with his logic? "Should I ask when we're going out?" Because now that everything's ok, I really, really don't want to wait anymore.

"How's tonight sound?" He leans forward again and kisses me until my brain has melted into a happy, squishy puddle.

"It sounds like a date." I kiss him again, not quite read to relinquish the contact. "Can we leave early?"

His eyes darken the slightest bit, obviously encouraged by my impatience. "I don't see any reason why we can't leave right after lunch."

My face must betray my confusion – here I am, doing my best to seduce my CO on the floor of a public restroom on our base, and he's, once again, oblivious. "Are you kidding me?"

He chuckles as he stands up, offering both of his hands to help me up. "I'm starving, Carter." He grins, leaning forward and pinning me against the wall with the entire length of his body. "And something tells me I'm going to need the energy."

I grin as I kiss him. "Well, I am a little younger than you."

Our unspoken agreement leads me to peer out the door, checking for any possible witnesses. Seeing none, I lead him out into the hall, only dropping his hand when I know we're getting in range of the security camera. "I'm going to check my lab so that nothing will burn up if I suddenly have to leave after lunch, sir."

He winks at me before heading in the other direction. "I'll meet you in the mess."


	4. Chapter Three

_AN: Comments are greatly appreciated and encourage me to write faster:) Enjoy!_

Chapter Three

A few hours later

Happy squishy puddle brain. It makes me smile just thinking that's all that's up there now. No more logical arguments, no more scientific theories, no more academic knowledge. Nope, just a happy squishy puddle that used to be my brain. I'm not even sad that I don't have a brain anymore. I don't think I'll miss it. Not with thoughts of kissing Jack to fill my days.

I finish my lunch quickly with no Jack to make eyes at. I hesitate for a few minutes when I'm done, trying to decide what to do with his abandoned lunch. He'll be mad if I throw it away, especially with all that hot sauce on it, but he can't really expect me to sit in the mess babysitting it until he remembers he left me here. Besides, we have plans and I want to brush my teeth before I see him again. Because I expect that there will be more kissing in the near future. And that makes my happy squishy puddle of a brain quiver with anticipation.

I take my time in the locker room, allowing myself the rare girlish indulgence of preening. I brush my teeth. I reapply my lipstick. I fix my hair, amused that it's mussed because Jack's hands were in it. There's not really much I can do about my uniform without drawing attention to the fact that I'm planning on an unexpected departure any minute now.

Daniel pops his head in the door, luckily as I'm closing my locker and not while I was primping – he just witnessed Jack and I in the mess and I don't want to live with his teasing, good-natured though it may be. He holds up Jack's other vial of hot sauce. "This isn't the sample."

I look at him like he's crazy. "No, that's the colonel's hot sauce."

Daniel shrugs as he replaces it in Jack's pocket. "He couldn't find it. And now we can't find him."

That news threatens the happy squishy puddle status of my brain. "You mean there's a vial of shrinking juice rolling around here somewhere?" I'm not concerned that they can't find Jack, though. He's probably hiding somewhere so no one can stop him from attending our little rendezvous. I wish I'd thought of it.

Daniel nods as we head out. "You've been spending too much time with Jack." Then he shrugs. "I assume it will become rather obvious in time, right?"

"Not like anyone's not going to notice a three year old running around here."

Daniel looks at me, brow furrowed in deep thought. "Are we sure they'd be three? I mean, it made you three, but maybe it's actually designed to take a certain number of years off someone, so if someone Jack's age took it, they'd be a teenager and if someone younger took it they'd be an infant."

I should probably say something, but my brain is still a happy squishy puddle so I shrug and go back to my original preoccupation. "Where was the colonel the last time you saw him?"

Daniel narrows his eyes at me. "Why?"

I feel my face burning again. "Because I have something I need to ask him, Daniel, ok?"

"Are you sure it's not because you want to go make out with him in the bathroom some more?"

"So it was Janet." That's the only way it could have gotten back to Daniel so quickly. Unfortunately, that knowledge does little to stop my blush.

"Aha! So it was you!" He grins cheekily. "Janet wasn't sure."

I fold my arms over my chest. "And just what would you have done if it hadn't been me?"

His grin doesn't fade. "Come on, Sam, who else could it have been?" I'm almost offended at this because I never really considered myself the type of woman people would assume would be necking on the floor of a bathroom at work. Almost. But not quite.

I roll my eyes and start walking again, not even bothering to hide my wide smile. "So where is he?"

"Last time I saw him, he was leaving General Hammond's office to look for the sample." Daniel winks at me. "Maybe he's fixing his hair so he'll look pretty for you." He chuckles to himself as he walks away.

I want to shout something mean and childish at his retreating figure. But I don't. Not because I'm a grown-up, mind you, but because my happy squishy puddle brain can't think of anything appropriate before he disappears around the corner.

I should just buy some blush and paint it all over my face. Maybe then no one will know that I'm blushing. I'm still thoroughly mortified as I begin searching the base. It's my firm, albeit ridiculous, belief that being with Jack will make me forget how much I hate being teased. It's not like he's never teased me, but it makes my insides all squirmy and mushy when he does it.

But no matter where I look, I can't find him. I'm quite disappointed that he has disappeared. We had plans; plans that I was very excited about and particularly attached to. As I'm scouring level 28, I bump into Walter. He looks frightened, but it's probably not my fault. No one is afraid of me.

But after a moment, his fear fades and he seems to be grinning knowingly at me. "Major Carter, General Hammond is looking for you."

My face, which had only just returned to normal, flushes again. Damn it. Is it that obvious? Or have Janet and Daniel started up the rumor mill at warp speed?

"Thank you, Walter." I head up to the general's office with a resigned sigh. One thing's for sure – if the general needs me, there won't be any skipping out early. When the general is looking for me for no apparent reason, it's usually because the Earth is doomed and I happen to be the only one who can save it. I grit my teeth as I climb the stairs. I'm so going to strangle Jack for this. But it's not like I can let the world end because if I do, then Jack and I will never have our date. Having priorities is important. Save Earth. Date Jack. They sound about equal to me.

General Hammond, however, doesn't seem to be in the midst of too bad a crisis. He looks mildly annoyed, but that is just as likely to be from too much starch in his shirt as from something actually being wrong. "Major, have you seen Colonel O'Neill?"

My face burns again. How can everyone already know? This relationship of ours is barely a half hour old. Even Daniel and Janet can't mobilize that fast. "Not since Daniel came to get him, sir." And you all thwarted our plans. But I probably should keep that part to myself. Ok, now he looks cross. Apparently, I am supposed to know exactly where Jack is, perhaps also revealing that we'd been making out on the bathroom floor again.

"Dr. Frasier noticed the sample for P3T-738 was not logged in. Colonel O'Neill was the last one to have it. And as soon as we start looking for it, the colonel disappears." He moves out from behind his desk to stand in front of me. "Does that seem at all suspicious to you?"

Admittedly, from the perspective of someone who doesn't know Jack like we do, those circumstances would seem a bit odd. But we do know Jack like we do. "Sir, it doesn't really sound like something he would do, sir." And I'm not falling for that Jack's-gone-to-the-dark-side bull again. I felt like an idiot for believing it the first time and that was only after he'd been mean to me. Jack wasn't being mean today. He was being particularly friendly. Not to mention we had plans for today that would so not have worked out the same if Jack was planning on regressing to childhood. Call me conceited, but I doubt very much that Jack would trade the evening with me that I had in mind for anything. Before my face can color even deeper at the thought I try to redirect my mind. "Colonel O'Neill doesn't usually handle the samples, sir. Perhaps he forgot about the cataloging procedure, especially when he returned and - um -" Damn it, there goes the color I was trying to avoid. I will not think about the intense way Jack looked at me in that shirt of his while I'm talking to the general. I. Will. Not. "And - uh - everything was back to normal, sir?"

General Hammond nods thoughtfully. "Did the colonel mention anything to you about leaving early today?"

I suddenly decide my shoes are very, very interesting. The colonel did mention something to me about leaving early today, but that fact seems immaterial to the question at hand since the leaving he'd mentioned involved taking me with him. I'm not sure the whole truth is necessary at this moment. "Um, I don't think he leaves early very often, sir." I feel better. My statement is entirely accurate.

"If you happen to see him, tell him to find me immediately."

As I leave the general's office, I am overcome with the sneaking suspicion that our date this evening is off. I'm barely halfway across the room when Daniel and three young airmen walk past me. I slow my steps to hear them as they address the general.

"Sir, according to the logs and the guards at the gate, Colonel O'Neill is still on base."

Daniel shrugs at the general. "His truck's in the lot, but I swear, he's not here."

I want to turn away and leave the room. Some part of me thinks that if I abandon them, they'll solve their dilemma without me. But I can't. My happy squishy puddle brain is starting to congeal back into normal brain material. A part of me is very frightened that no one can find Jack because Jack is notoriously hard to miss.

I sidle up to Daniel, listening as the general announces that he's locking down the base. He's on the phone ordering Walter to try to raise the Asgard, assuming maybe they borrowed the colonel again. Then he's making other calls and I hear sirens going off. I want to think this is too much fuss. He hasn't been missing for that long; maybe he's just hiding out somewhere, secretly panicking because of what we agreed to do.

But I'm actually quite scared that he appears to be missing. I hate to think something horrible was happening to him while I was putting on lipstick. I feel Daniel nudge my arm and I look up to see him staring at me with a worried look. His eyes dart to General Hammond, making sure he's distracted.

"Are you all right, Sam?"

I nod, although I'm not even convincing myself.

"You look terrified."

I know I should fake it better, but there's really no point with Daniel. I glance at the general to make sure he's still raising the alarm. Then I lean closer to Daniel. "He should be here."

"Of course he should. He's probably hiding out, playing with that slinky he's been keeping in his locker."

Hearing that shouldn't make me want to cry, but it does. "No, Daniel, you don't understand. He wouldn't be hiding today."

Daniel looks intrigued and apparently is intrigued because he pulls me out of Hammond's office. "What do you mean?"

I bite my lip and remind myself that this is Daniel. He's one of our two closest friends. Teasing or not, he can be trusted. "Because we had plans, Daniel. He wouldn't have skipped out on me."

Rather than seeing the gravity of the situation, Daniel grins. "Right, making out in the bathroom. Or were you heading for the locker room to change it up a bit?"

I can't help it. I reach out and smack his chest. "It's not funny."

I must still look terrified because Daniel reaches out and places his hands on my shoulders. "We'll find him. I'm sure he's fine."

"You're damn right we'll find him." General Hammond's voice makes me jump and I know the blush isn't going to subside anytime soon. I have no idea when he emerged from his office or how much he overheard, but I'm thinking that fact that I'm probably sickeningly pale from worry might help hide the furious blush that reappears.

But just in case, I think I'm just going to start telling people that it's a rash.


	5. Chapter Four

_AN: Sorry for the delay. I was pretty much hiding out this weekend. Enjoy!_

Chapter Four

Three hours later, I'm in the exact same spot. Not that I have been here for three hours straight. I'm not sure the general would put up with that. Everyone in the base is still on alert, looking everywhere they think Jack might be sitting somehow unaware of all the activity. I actually saw someone checking the cabinets in the mess. Yes, the colonel is obsessed with food in general and he was looking for hotter hot sauce today, but I don't think he would have climbed into a cabinet looking for something better. And if he had, I don't think he would have stayed there silently for three hours until someone opened the door for him.

My attention, and honestly most other people's attentions, is focused on Jack's absence. The general is trying to divide his time equally between the missing colonel and the missing sample and has mentioned a fear that kidnapping Jack was actually meant to be a diversion for someone stealing the sample. I'm not sure I buy that, because even if you could make millions of dollars with the fountain, or more accurately vial, of youth, I firmly believe that it would not be worth the trouble kidnapping Jack O'Neill would cause. Because really, even I don't want to be around Jack when he's in a bad mood.

There are a few random people traipsing in and out of the room while Hammond talks to the remaining members of SG-1. Well, he's talking to Teal'c and Daniel, really, cause I'm sure as hell not listening. I keep looking out the window at the Stargate and hoping that Jack will magically appear with some wild tale about Thor. I'm only been catching a few words here and there, but I tune in long enough to hear the general ask about the last time anyone saw Loh'ran's sample.

Teal'c is the first to speak and I listen because his voice is very soothing to my frazzled nerves. "O'Neill received the sample from Chancellor Loh'ran. Before we returned through the Stargate, he transferred the sample into a container with a tighter seal that would prevent leaks." He raises the container of Jack's hot sauce. "It was a container like this one."

Hammond nods at it. "And you're sure that's not it."

Teal'c nods. "This is the milk of the kanai flower which I have provided to O'Neill on many occasions with which to season his food." For some reason, my attention is ratcheted to his words. "O'Neill placed the vial in his pocket." Teal'c then motioned to his chest, indicating the pocket where Jack kept his hot sauce.

My squeak probably would have garnered some attention from the three men before me if one of the chairs hadn't suddenly and spontaneously rolled itself away from the conference table. None of us are particularly naïve nor do we tend to supernatural beliefs. The four of us simply stare at the empty chair. Maybe we're waiting for it to move back. Maybe we're waiting for it to levitate. Maybe we're waiting for someone to announce that Jack magically became invisible and is now only able to communicate by moving chairs.

I think I might be the only one who isn't entirely surprised to see a tiny hand reach up and land on the table. The tiny hand is followed by another. Then, slowly, the top of a mussed, shaggy head of brown hair appears. Two big brown eyes just barely peek over the edge, wide with wonder as an adorable little boy stares at us staring at him.

Teal'c says nothing, perhaps to his credit as it prevents him from saying something stupid. Daniel, who is prone to overthinking things, wonders aloud if the people who kidnapped Jack to get at the sample accidentally left this kid behind. General Hammond calls for someone to take the boy into custody.

But me, well, I'd know those brown eyes anywhere, and so I simply smile. "Hi, Jack."

He regards me uncertainly for a moment and I can practically see the threat assessment going on in his head - if I look scary or mean or dishonest. His eyes narrow the slightest bit, but I think he's going to trust me.

But Teal'c speaks, informing General Hammond that he believes we have located O'Neill and ascertained the fate of the missing sample at the same time. Jack's eyes widen as his attention turns to Teal'c. Now I was there when Teal'c and Jack met for the first time and I know their camaraderie was pretty much instantaneous, as opposed to me and Jack. For us, the attraction was instantaneous, but there was a period when we didn't quite trust one another. Apparently little Jack doesn't have the same bond with Teal'c. And speaking from experience, Teal'c is a little bit scary to a kid. Jack's head and hands disappear back under the conference table, where he must have been hiding out all this time.

Daniel turns to me. "Are you sure that's Jack? He seems a little shy, doesn't he?"

I grin and nod. "He's only a little boy, Daniel. He's scared. But it's definitely him."

I pry my eyes away from the conference table long enough to glance at General Hammond. Boy, he does not look happy. Finally he shakes his head. "Major, please deal with this. SG-6 has a debriefing in fifteen minutes. I do not expect there to be any children present." Then he walks away and shuts himself in his office.

Daniel stares after him. "What does he expect you to do?"

"I guess I'm babysitting." I look at the boys and shrug as I drop to all fours to crawl under the conference table with Jack.

I am a relatively well-adjusted heterosexual female. Due mainly to the obscene number of hours I've spent in this room around this very table with Jack in the past seven years, I have had the occasional, or fairly common to be honest, inappropriate thought about doing things with him I probably shouldn't have been imagining doing with him in this room and on and under and against and well, you get the idea regarding this table. At any rate, when I imagined crawling under the conference table to meet Jack, this was so not what I had in mind.

I look at him as my eyes adjust to the limited light, knowing all too well that while I didn't understand it at the time, I was able to remember everything that happened to me while I was shrunk. I sit Indian-style in front of him and smile so I don't seem scary to the precious little boy in before me. And then I whisper a threat to him that I know he won't understand until he's himself again.

"This is twice now, Jack. You only get one more chance with me." Because while I imagine we'll be having dinner together tonight, that is so not the date I had in mind.

I'm expecting some sort of response from him. I figure his bravado was something he learned in his military career, but I think the sarcastic wit has probably always been with him. But Jack just stares at me, unblinking, while he sizes me up.

"I'm Sam." I smile harder, thinking that just like the grown-up version, baby Jack somehow gets cuter with every passing second. "And you're Jack." I'm hoping to get some sort of a response from him, but the best I get is a slightly confused look. And then it occurs to me. "Or are you John?"

He smiles then, nodding his head emphatically, yet still says nothing.

I incline my head toward the brightness of the room. "You want to get some cake?" His eyes light up and he bobs his head again. "Ok, John, let's go."


	6. Chapter Five

_AN: As always, comments are aprreciated, loved, and given a wonderful home!_

Chapter Five

I crawl back out into the conference room, smiling at Daniel who is still waiting. "He wants cake."

Daniel grins. "I guess it is Jack then, huh?"

"Actually, it's John."

"Are you going to bring cake back to him?"

I turn around at Daniel's words, realizing that Jack has not followed me. He's still crouched under the table, staring up at me without giving up his hiding place. I smile at him. "Come on, cake's this way." He doesn't move and is actually starting to look like he's about to cry. "It's ok, John." I reach my hand toward him and he grabs it, holding mine in both of his before he reluctantly joins me. I squat down as Daniel does the same. "John, this is my friend Daniel."

Daniel's eyes light up as he smiles charmingly at little Jack. "Hi, buddy. You can come see my office where I have all sorts of neat stuff from Egypt and I'll tell you all about it!"

I force back my laughter. Daniel is going to use this as the perfect opportunity to get even with Jack for all those years of not listening to him. But instead of responding, Jack drops my hand and launches himself into my arms, burying his face in my neck and sobbing. I giggle. I can't help it. "I guess it's innate, Daniel." I rub Jack's back, trying to get him to release his hold on my neck. "Hey, it's ok. You don't have to go if you don't want."

But Jack doesn't release me. So I stand up, scooping up a pint-sized Jack O'Neill, and carry him to the mess. Cake has always worked when Jack was in a bad mood. I hope that always means at three years old too.

I don't even make it through the line in the mess before the cooing starts. I hear nothing but exclamations (how cute!) and declarations (he's the sweetest thing I've ever seen!), and questions (can I hold him?). I know I should resist, but somehow it seems like too much fun to say no. I try to pass Jack to a familiar lieutenant. He doesn't know what I'm doing for a moment and his stubby little arms release me. But the instant the woman reaches for him, he starts kicking. And wailing.

And how.

He's inconsolable until his arms are fastened around my neck once again. He's trying to wrap his legs around me as well, but they're just too short. He's sniffling and whimpering and acting mortally wounded at the thought that I would let someone else touch him. I swear, if I didn't already love him, this adorable, utterly honest show of favoritism would have made me.

I smile and shrug apologetically at the woman. "Sorry. He's not in the mood, I guess."

She smiles and reaches out to tickle him. "He's just a mama's boy, isn't he?"

I start laughing at the comment while Jack squirms to escape the tickles. Eventually he manages to kick me in the ribs and my howl of pain effectively stops the assault.

"I'm so sorry, ma'am." She looks frightened.

"It's ok. You didn't kick me." I jostle Jack playfully on my hip and he giggles happily. I grin at him. "No giggling." He ignores me and continues. "Not so easy, is it?"

"Ma'am?"

Here, I'd be so drawn in by those brilliant brown eyes that I thought the lieutenant had ceased to exist. Apparently not. "Yes?"

"Are they twins?"

Suddenly paranoid, I spin around, searching for another child. I don't see any, but then no one saw Jack for hours. "Twins?"

The woman smiles broadly. "The colonel had your little girl with him a few weeks ago. She looked about the same age, so I wondered if they're twins."

Oh, there's that blush again. Now I know why this woman looks familiar. It's not just from seeing her on base. I remember clearly the day to which she is referring. I was wrapped up happily in Jack's arms. The lieutenant was making a fuss over my three year old self. She'd said something about naming me after my mother, I think. I even remember telling Jack that she was pretty after she was gone. I grin as I recall his retort - that she wasn't as pretty as me.

Still smiling, I ruffle Jack's hair with my free hand. "They're Irish twins." I just can't resist.

The lieutenant smiles knowingly. "Yeah, I wouldn't be able to keep my hands off of him either." She turns back to the line, obviously not expecting a reprimand.

Technically I should remind her that it's inappropriate to speak that way about a superior officer, especially in front of another superior officer, and just plain stupid to speak that way about a superior officer to another superior officer who is close friends with the officer in question. The feminine side of me wants to cheer that I have won the heart of the man that this cute, young thing would love to have. But really, I just want to yell at her to keep her hands off my man. And although I know I shouldn't, I really, really want to.

The only reason I don't is because Jack will remember it and tease me about it for the rest of time if I get in a catfight over him.

Eventually, Jack and I make it through the line and get our piece of cake. He claims that he wants his own piece, but I ignore him. I was quite skilled at eating huge portions of food as a small child, but my experience with other people's kids indicates that few of them actually finish a whole plate of anything. I'm not particularly hungry myself, so I insist that we share. Jack's eyes go wide as he scans the crowded room. I can see the math going on in his head - all those people, so little cake.

"We don't have to share with everyone."

He looks at me hopefully. "Just with you?"

I nod. Jack and I were meant to be sharing dessert today anyhow. The thought makes me grin. Unfortunately, this isn't what I had in mind. I narrow my eyes at him. "You so owe me for this afternoon and don't think for one second I'm going to stop reminding you until you've made it up to me."

Jack looks confused, but then, in typical Jack fashion, he focuses on the cake in my hand and smiles.

I shake my head and find a table. "Some things never change." I settle Jack in a chair and choose the one next to him for myself. Honestly, I have never given much thought to what Jack was like as a child, but I never would have expected him to be short. I can't help but giggle as I watch him climb up onto his knees to be able to reach high enough to touch the plate. I wonder if too many years of sitting on his knees is the real reason for his bad joints rather than all those vague sports injuries he claims.

I look around, some part of me irrationally expecting to find a highchair or a booster seat for him. I'd settle for a telephone book or a pile of newspapers, really. But there's nothing around. I pull Jack into my lap, promising myself that I will never mention this seating arrangement again. I think Jack would die of shame. You know, unless there was cake involved. Cause really, when has anything trumped cake in Jack's mind? Not that I blame him, though, because as far as mess food goes, the cake is scrumptious and I kind of wish I'd bought more.

Jack takes a bite and announces loudly that the cake is yummy. I agree with him, although not as loudly. We're able to enjoy a few bites each while we ignore the onlookers. But we can't ignore it when Daniel and Teal'c walk in and take the seats opposite us.

Daniel looks amused. "I bet you two are enjoying yourselves."

And again with the blushing. I don't even really have time to react before Jack drops the fork, spins around in my lap, and buries his face in my neck. His arms wind tightly around me as well and I am forced to support him for fear of spinal cord damage.

Teal'c raises his eyebrow. "I would like to offer my services to amuse the child."

I can only imagine there's a legitimate reason for his offer. I tug on Jack's vice grip. "John, this is my friend Teal'c. He wants to play with you." Rather than looking, Jack whimpers and snuggles closer. I look at Daniel. He's very amused.

"I never imagined Jack to be a bashful child." He furrows his brow for a moment and then shakes it off. "Sam, there's something wrong with the computers and General Hammond sent us to get you." He glances nervously at Jack. "But he doesn't want you to be distracted while you're working on something critical, so we're supposed to help out." Daniel keeps looking at Jack as though he might suddenly start listening.

Yeah, right, this is Jack. He never listens unless someone's, usually his own, life is on the line.

"I'm not sure that's such a good idea, Daniel." I lift my hands away from Jack to reveal how tightly Jack is holding on to me. "Something tells me there's going to be screaming involved and I really don't want there to be screaming."

Teal'c nods. "We shall accompany you during the repairs."

"I don't think the general was kidding about not seeing Jack. He seems to think Jack did this on purpose." Daniel's voice drops to a whisper, which I'm eventually going to have to tell him, only increases the number of people trying to overhear.

My face burns again. I'm not about to admit that it was my fault, but I may not have a choice if Jack's going to get in trouble over it. "He's shy, Daniel. He's not going to draw any attention to himself."

Daniel smiles. "Maybe the general doesn't have to know."

"Exactly." I stand up and Daniel follows suit.

Teal'c grabs the abandoned plate and fork. "I shall be prepared to bargain for the child's silence and respectable behavior."

"You're a smart man, Teal'c." I feel like I should have been the one to think of it.

Teal'c smiles, obviously pleased with himself and with my assessment. "Indeed."


	7. Chapter Six

Chapter Six

The four of us draw a surprising lack of curious stares as we parade back to the control room. We catch a break in that General Hammond is nowhere in sight. I talk to the technicians, getting the specifics of the problem, hearing the list of fixes already attempted, and, as far as I'm concerned, doing a fairly excellent job of not revealing exactly how charmed I am by Jack, who is drifting off to sleep with his head on my shoulder and his thumb in his mouth. It's damn near the most adorable thing I've ever seen. I want to stare at him and muse over just how sweet his is, but instead, I'm forced to work.

I take my seat, arranging Jack so that his back is supported by the edge of the desk, therefore freeing my hands to type. I dispatch all the personnel in the room to watch each entrance so that I might have time to escape if the general shows up.

Jack is amazingly well-behaved - amazing not just because he's a bored three year old, but because he's Jack and has never suffered boredom quietly. He takes a nap for the first half hour and then he amuses himself by staring at me while I type. I'm heartened by that steadfast stare since I'm quite familiar with getting that look from him and I always imagined it was because he wasn't really listening to me. Now I know he's just somehow fascinated by me. Just like I'm fascinated by him - big Jack or little Jack, I swear, I could stare at either of them for days without blinking. When Jack finally starts moving around, Daniel sits beside me, attempting to occupy Jack by making fish faces. Jack is not amused. He looks at me, chin trembling and tears forming. I shush him.

"Daniel, please, leave well enough alone." I know Daniel means well, but I don't want Jack to get too overwhelmed. I bounce my knees, trying to distract Jack. "Hey, it's ok, buddy." Jack glances between me and Daniel as though he's trying to determine if I'm telling the truth. His face crumbles. Daniel looks crushed.

Teal'c sits down on the other side of me, holding a forkful of cake out to Jack. "I will give you cake in exchange for your cooperation, young O'Neill."

Apparently cake really does cute all ails, including shyness. Jack leans over and eats the cake off the fork in Teal'c's hand. "Yummy."

Teal'c is once again quite pleased with himself. "Now you must be silent as you have accepted my proposition."

I don't think Jack actually understands Teal'c words, but he watches him solemnly and remains quiet nonetheless. I turn back to the computer, interrupted momentarily by Jack turning around in my lap. He rests his tiny, chubby hands on the wrist rest between mine, but that's all. He's quiet and behaving for the moment, so I let him sit there, occasionally pausing while he plays with my watch.

Lulled by his mature behavior, Teal'c sets the cake down on the desk and folds his hands in his lap. Daniel's still on the opposite side of me pouting because little Jack is afraid of him. I think it might be the glasses. I'm pretty absorbed in my work. Now, I'm not quite sure what happened to the computer, but it seems that a fairly large portion of data has been either overwritten or erased completely. I'm trying to play down the problem because if I draw attention to the fact that I'm not sure I can fix it, then the techs will all start running around in a tizzy blaming each other for allowing a virus to infect the base mainframe and then General Hammond will arrive to see why all the techs are in a tizzy and he'll discover me with my three year old CO on my lap and a busted computer system and then I'll get in trouble over two somethings that are not my fault.

Ok, true, the three year old something is my fault, but I'm not admitting it unless Jack's career is in serious jeopardy because it's going to be bad enough that he knows, which he will since he knew about the hot sauce he sent me to find, and he'll happily give me hell over it for years to come.

I think I'm doing a particularly fabulous job of multitasking at this moment - reprogramming the computer, entertaining Jack, and listening intently for telltale signs that the boss is coming to court martial me. Jack is also doing a particularly fabulous job of behaving. Of course, he has always liked to sit with me while I work provided I don't get too excited about what I'm working on and start telling him about it.

I curse under my breath when I realize the computer is absolutely not fixable. Jack looks back at me with his eyes wide as saucers and I'm forced to acknowledge that if I uttered the same string of expletives in his presence normally, I would undoubtedly get the same wide-eyed stare. Jack doesn't think I know those sorts of words. Well, I guess he does now.

As for the computer - it's gone. Far too much data, far too many important programs. The whole damn system is corrupted as far as I can tell, and my knowledge of this system is pretty damn far. We're going to have to revert to backups which is going to upset the general because he always thinks backups mean an impending alien invasion rather than his precious staff getting bored and screwing around with things they shouldn't have touched in the first place. I've found more damage is usually done by people trying to correct something they messed up than the original mistake. I don't relish the idea of telling him, so I keep praying my third attempts will magically fix everything left unfixed by my first two.

And then my ears prick at the sound of footfalls on the stairs. So much for my early warning tech system. I don't even have to look to know it's the general. I can tell by the dead silence. I think everyone is holding their breath with me. Moved by loyalty, and perhaps a bit by fear, Daniel and Teal'c jump to their feet and stand behind me. It's too late to move Jack out of sight so they're trying to block the general's view. I wince as I look up and see the general's reflection in the glass. I can see him perfectly.

Which means he can see me.

Which means he can see Jack.

I immediately comprehend that I've disobeyed an order, indirect as it may have been in coming through Daniel. I hope he'll offer me retirement in lieu of a court martial. At least that will settle the issue of what Jack and I are going to do about our budding relationship - I don't mean the caretaker-child one - and our careers. Even so, I'm still not looking forward to getting yelled at.

The general's face is almost frightening, his eyes narrowed and his lips pressed into a thin line. The techs have scattered. Daniel and Teal'c have even backed off. They haven't abandoned me completely, but they are hovering by the door, prepared to run for their lives.

I jump to my feet, barely even noticing the almost instinctive way I hold Jack tight through the abrupt move. He clings to me in fear, as always reading my emotions and reacting in kind. "Sir, the colonel has not impacted my ability to work on the computer system at all."

The general looks at the computer and then back at me. "Are you telling me that was your idea?"

I feel my stomach drop to my feet as I slowly turn back to the computer. There's the computer. There's the keyboard. There are the odd flashing messages on the screen that I somehow missed while I was looking at the general. There's the plate of cake smashed upside down on the keyboard. I think my heart just stopped.


	8. Chapter Seven

_AN: Enjoy! And let me know if you do!_

Chapter Seven

I let out a horrified moan. We were doing so well. It serves me right for trying to please everyone simultaneously. I think I might actually strangle Jack for his unannounced redecorating of the keyboard in the cutting-edge chocolate cake style.

Well, I'd strangle him if he wasn't clinging to me and crying in fear of General Hammond's stare. I can hardly blame him. I've seen generals angry. I've seen COs angry. I've just never seen them so angry at me.

Belatedly, I jump to my feet, unable to do anything resembling detaching Jack from my person, and face the general. "To be perfectly honest, sir, the, um, accident here hasn't really made the situation with the computer any worse than it already was. Extensive damage was done to the entire system prior to our arrival."

He still doesn't look happy, but at least his angry glare is now aimed, typically, at the Stargate. Still misplaced, but a vast improvement. Considering the amount of trouble I should be in, I'm happy with baby steps. He looks back at me with a less angry, more disappointed sort of look. "Major, you can have whatever resources you need to fix it, but make it happen yesterday."

"Yes, sir." I relax. Anger, disappointment, whatever he's feeling towards me at the moment, doesn't matter; at least he still recognizes that I'm the person who can repair it. I have, on many unhappy occasions, which were far more frequent in my younger days, made people so angry they wouldn't let me help. I'm off the hook.

"And Major, let me assure you that Jack is not one of the resources you need. Do you understand?"

I'm only sort of off the hook. My face falls. I don't want to let Jack out of my sight - not just because it will upset him, but because he'll be mortified when he's back to normal and remembers other people seeing him shy and scared and vulnerable. I don't think he'll particularly mind if I witness it - he trusts me. But it's not like I can pretend I didn't hear Hammond's order this time. "Yes, sir."

"Dr. Jackson, please amuse the colonel here until Major Carter is finished or, God willing, he returns to normal." He watches as Daniel and I silently commiserate about our orders. This will not be pleasant. "And find him some clothes too."

Now I think the giant tee-shirt on his tiny self is perfectly adorable, but Jack will probably not appreciate it, especially not when he returns to normal size. I flush just thinking about how humiliated I felt wearing only Jack's shirt and his shirt was considerably longer on me than it would be on him. Daniel, who had been slowly approaching us from his hiding place in the doorway, stops at Hammond's words. I guess the clothing thing is bothering him - which I can understand from his position. I remember Daniel and Jack discussing me when I'd had my little mud bath in an attempt to embarrass myself to death and I quite pointedly remember Daniel's reaction when Jack suggested he give me a bath since Jack wasn't about to do it himself. Modesty is just one more reason Daniel is completely adorable sometimes.

Though I have to admit, not as completely adorable as Jack, who is back to being perfectly angelic. He's feeling brave at the moment and is offering a particularly endearing left-handed salute to General Hammond. I swear General Hammond is fighting back a smile. Hell, who does he think he's kidding? He can't resist grown-up Jack's antics anymore than I can, so he's bound to be as much of a sucker for little Jack.

Daniel takes a step backwards. "Maybe I should track down those clothes."

Hammond turns on him so fast I think he's actually going to yell, which is kind of scary. He never yells at Daniel. It's hard to get, and stay, mad at Daniel long enough to yell. Apparently, Hammond's not such a sucker after all.

Daniel's scared too. "Or that could wait." He comes over to me and winces as he reaches out for Jack. Jack, who turned back to watch me intently, has no idea what's happening. I smile bravely, hoping Jack will get the idea that everything is ok. I hold him out, trying to block out those wide, trusting eyes.

Because it only takes a millisecond for Jack to figure out that his happy little world of being in my arms is crashing to a halt. His eyes widen as Daniel's arms fold around him. I'm trying not to look because I know it will break my heart to see the devastation on his face. He starts kicking and reaching for me.

And screaming. "SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!"

Daniel hesitates and I start to reach for Jack. I feel a physical response to his cries and I need to comfort him. I can tell from Daniel's face that he's not exactly pleased with the idea of tormenting Jack either - they are close friends, after all.

"Dr. Jackson, he'll quiet down in a minute. He'll forget she even exists as soon as she's out of sight." General Hammond's words seem exceedingly harsh and, if I weren't already skating on thin ice with my boss, I'd glare at him for suggesting such a thing.

Daniel remains frozen as Jack continues to scream. For such a little kid, he's pretty damn loud. He's also breaking my heart. I can't stand the idea that he's crying, especially for me, and I'm right here and I can't do anything about it. Luckily, I guess, Teal'c realizes that both Daniel and I are paralyzed.

He moves in, reaching for Jack himself. "Come with us, child, we will find objects of amusement with which to distract you."

Jack isn't soothed for a second. He stops screaming only long enough to sniffle and take a breath before he starts screaming my name again.

"Toys, Jack. He means we'll find you toys to play with." Daniel, ever the linguist, thinks something was lost in the translation. Or maybe he's just trying to get Jack to stop kicking.

Apparently, Jack has no interest in anything but me. I should be flattered, but I'm too busy fighting back tears. I can't stand the idea of Jack in pain, real or imagined. I turn to the general. He's shocked by Jack's response.

"He can stay with me, sir. He's not in the way." I have to raise my voice to nearly a shout to be heard over the wail of my name. "Please, sir?"

Unfortunately, Hammond must really be mad at Jack or at the fact that Jack's attachment to me is obviously innate. I know I reacted the same way, although in a much more subdued manner, to Jack two weeks ago. It must be upsetting for Hammond to finally comprehend that what's between Jack and I is that strong and inherent and impossible to deny. If I think about it for long, I'm going to realize that it's pretty damn upsetting for me too since this little piece of information will never be forgotten by the general.

"Absolutely not, major. Maybe we have a chance to teach Colonel O'Neill that he can't always have his way." He looks at Teal'c and Daniel who are holding Jack at an arm's length between them to stay free of his kicks. "Get him out of here."

I'm so upset watching them carry him away, especially by his pathetic attempt to grab the doorframe as they walk through it, that I nearly point out how Jack and I are a shining example that Jack is already well acquainted with not getting his way. Instead I stare after them, listening to Jack's howling that does not quiet at all. It's more distant and more desperate. I know they're probably near the elevator now and it's all I can do not to run after them. I really don't know how long I can bear hearing him scream before I lose my mind. It hurts. It actually hurts. I don't think I even realized how much I love him.

But I do suddenly - in the painfully silent moment following the elevator doors closing when I know he's still screaming for me and I can't even hear him anymore. I drop into my chair with my chin trembling. I can't think. I can't speak. I can't see through the tears. I'm sure the general is staring at me, unhappy at my atypically emotional response. I'm sure the techs are staring at me too. I don't care. And I solemnly swear that I will never forgive the general for this. No one who hurts Jack is easily forgiven.

And actually, thinking of Harry Maybourne, no one who hurts Jack is forgiven period.


	9. Chapter Eight

_AN: I didn't make you wait too long for this one... Hope you like it!_

Chapter Eight

One thing I've learned over the years is how to bury my feelings in my work. I turn back to the computer, resolving that I will not sob over the plate still stuck on the keyboard, nor about the chocolate icing that is slowly melting between the keys. Jack hadn't meant any harm. And it was Hammond's fault anyway - if Daniel, Teal'c and I hadn't been distracted by Hammond, we would have caught him before he had the chance to make a mess.

I pull the plug free of the machine and bark out an order at one of the techs to get me another keyboard. He scampers off immediately and I have the sneaking suspicion he's not coming back.

See, I've heard the rumors. They think I don't know what they say, but I do. Everyone complains about what a bitch I am when Jack's hurt or missing or away or mad. I'd probably be angrier about it if I didn't know it was entirely true. And this whole scene with Jack screaming for me and me not being able to help him - well it's definitely setting off my bitchy tendencies.

Much to my surprise, the tech does actually return. He looks scared, but he's new so maybe he's just overwhelmed and hasn't heard the rumors yet. I set up the new keyboard and start work on recovering the system. General Meanie-Man, formerly known as Hammond, seems satisfied that I'm going to work and heads up to his office. I glare at the stairs for not tripping him. As soon as the coast is clear, I dispatch the same tech on an important mission - he's to find Jack and the boys and report back to me as to how things are going.

Calmed slightly by the notion that I will, hopefully, soon hear word that Jack is happy playing with his buddies, I actually settle in to work. I'm hopelessly distracted though and through a series of unfortunate, accidental keystrokes, I successfully manage to completely corrupt the controls for the iris.

Walter is sitting quietly by my side. He reminds me of a puppy. He's kind of like SG-1's loyal dog. He sits by the gate and waits for us to come home and he gets all excited when we bring friends and he never holds it against us if we're gone too long and he immediately forgets any slights as soon as we offer him a smile. Next time Jack mentions getting a dog, I'm going to remind him that we already have one.

At the moment, Walter is staring wide-eyed at me watching the iris open inexplicably before suddenly refusing to respond to any further commands. "Ma'am?"

"Fuck." I close my eyes and shake my head. I never make mistakes - at least not huge, glaring, spectacular displays of unbelievable stupidity like this.

Walter starts frantically trying to close the iris, panicking because it's not working and because I'm just sitting here like an idiot. "Ma'am? Should we use the manual controls?"

I wave my hand dismissively. The word manual is misleading. It's still processed through the computer; they're just in a heavily protected, walled-off, and now very broken part of the computer system. "They're not working either." I look back at the gate, the wide open door to just about anything, including the gates of hell, and I know there are a million reasons - like the goa'uld - to get the computer back online. But I'm far to distracted by missing Jack to muster up enough concern to react.

Seriously, this is the one time I can hold Jack in my arms and not care who sees us and I'll be damned if General Pissy-Pants isn't being mean.

But before I can even try to refocus on the situation at hand, the phone rings. I'm hoping against hope that it's Daniel calling to tell me that Jack's big again and then I can fix the computer and we can go get our dinner together after all. Amazingly, it is Daniel. Unfortunately, he's shouting, trying to make his voice heard over the continuous shriek of my name that is still, well, continuous.

"Steve here tells me you wanted to know how things were going. They're just peachy. See?" He must have approached Jack with the phone because the scream got much louder and shifted from the word Sam to full-on hysterical screaming. "Yeah, things are great here. We've got it under control. How are things up there?"

I look at Walter, who's hyperventilating, and then at the unprotected gate. "Even better, Daniel. They're even better."

"What?" He can't hear me over the screaming and I can't stand to listen to it, so I just hang up.

I look at Walter and a randomly useful thought occurs to me. "Call a defense team to stand by in the gate room just in case." He seems excessively pleased that I've said something so normal and expected. I can practically see his tail wagging happily as he calls the request over the PA system. I wonder if he'd like to get patted on the head. I watch as the defense team takes up position to hold off any intruders that might arrive and I smile.

No, I'm not extremely proud of my fellow airmen. I'm extremely proud that I've effectively killed two birds with one stone.

"Is there a problem, Major Carter?" Teal'c's voice sounds behind me and it's so welcome I almost hug him. But I can't hug him because there's a three-year-old whirlwind throwing himself into my arms at the moment.

Daniel looks relieved and scared at the same time. It's a disconcerting expression to behold. "Sam, what's wrong?"

I'm so happy I could sing, despite the impending crisis. I could get up and dance a little tap number around the control room with a top hat and cane right now. You see, I know a little something about the way things work here and I know that there's no way SG-1 doesn't come running when a defense team is called to the gate room.

And maybe, just maybe, the fact that I broke the iris will make General Party Pooper so mad that he'll ban me from working on it and I can go play with Jack.

I don't have time to answer the inquiries of my teammates before I hear the telltale sound of feet on the stairs. I look at Jack, who has happily snuggled up in my arms. He's able to read my concern, feel my tension just like always, and his head turns toward the stairs. Now Jack is an intelligent man; we've covered that. But he's also an intelligent baby because his stubby little arms instantly release me. Before I know what's happening, he shimmies free of my arms, across my lap, and quietly plops onto the floor at my feet. Then his arms wrap around one of my calves in a tight clench. Daniel grins; Teal'c also cracks a smile. I would have suspected them of teaching him to hide like that except I know he didn't stop screaming long enough to learn anything while he was gone.

Daniel flattens himself against the wall to avoid being noticed by Hammond as he approaches me. Teal'c merely steps out of the general's way, knowing there's simply no way he can blend in anywhere. General Hammond shows no sign of realizing his orders have been disregarded. He steps up to the window, alarm showing in his eyes.

"Major Carter, what's the problem?"

With Jack snuggly and silently attached to my leg, I feel a lot happier about work and actually feel a little guilt for my part in the iris issue. "I'm working on repairing the system, sir. Unfortunately, the iris controls went offline. I ordered the defense team as a precautionary measure until the iris is fully functional."

Hammond nods thoughtfully and, for a brief moment when he glances at Daniel and then narrows his eyes at me, I fear he's going to remember that he just ordered Daniel and Teal'c and the screaming miniature Jack out of here. "How long until the iris is functional again?"

This is a difficult question. I hadn't been paying enough attention to really have a firm grasp of exactly how I'd managed to bust the iris in the first place, so I have no idea if it will take two minutes or two hours. "Less than thirty minutes, sir." The rule of thumb with the general is that for any time estimates measured in hours, he'll order me to fix it faster. He's usually more lenient when it comes to anything less.

As if to taunt me, the iris slides closed. I breathe a sigh of relief - if it has to be broken, it's better that it's broken closed. Then it opens again and I swear, if titanium can smirk, that's exactly what it's doing.

He doesn't look pleased, but he nods. "Thirty minutes, Major."

I nod happily, knowing this brief conversation has probably tested the patience of the remarkably quiet three-year-old hiding under the desk. "Yes, sir."

Hammond heads back to the stairs, but turns back just as I start to relax. "Dr. Jackson, I believe I ordered you to remove the child."

Smart boy that he is, Jack's grip tightens on my leg. I glance at Daniel, who is looking very guilty as he mouths the word 'sorry' at me. He's not going to get court martialed; I might. I twist around in my chair, lifting Jack off the ground as I move. "Sir-"

Hammond holds up his hand. "My patience is wearing thin. Dr. Jackson, take the boy to the guest quarters and make sure he stays there this time."

Daniel's shoulders slump dejectedly as he squats down to reach for Jack. We all hear Jack take in a deep breath, preparing to scream again. I reach out and rest my hand on his head, quieting him for the moment. "Sir, please, he's afraid of Daniel."

I know he wasn't kidding about his patience wearing thin and he's been more understanding than most generals would be when people seem to be completely ignoring his orders, so I'm expecting to face the brunt of his anger. But apparently my statement catches him so entirely off guard that he forgets he's mad at us.

"Why in God's name would anyone be afraid of Daniel?"

Daniel answers for me as he stands up, assuming he's got a reprieve. "It's Jack. When has he ever made sense?"

Hammond nods toward Jack, who is attached with both arms and both legs to my leg. "As long as he doesn't get in the way, Jack can stay with you."

I'm about to smile my thanks, but Jack beats me to it. "Yay!" He releases my leg and scrambles back up into my lap, nuzzling his face into my neck. Ok, so as much as I love having Jack attached literally and figuratively to me, I'm more than a little embarrassed at the moment.

General Hammond starts to smile, but any response he might have had is cut off by the sounds of the gate connecting. None of us have to ask since we all know no one is due back today. I turn back to watch as the wormhole opens, my arms instinctively tightening around Jack. We're defenseless and now I feel more than a little stupid that I couldn't put my personal feelings aside to fix the computer since Jack is as much at the mercy of whoever comes through as the rest of us.

The silence is almost anticlimactic as no one appears. The gate doesn't disengage though, so I know something is happening. I try running every command that is still working on the gate. "There's an EM signal coming through, sir, but the computer can't interpret it."

Hammond grabs the intercom. "Stay sharp, people." The defense team was already aiming at the gate, but his words make everyone stand up a little straighter. He turns back to me. "Do we have any idea what or who to expect?"

I shake my head. "No, sir." I don't want to mention it since I have no particular reason for thinking it, but something about the EM signal seems very familiar. Maybe I should mention it. Maybe I should at least react to my own instincts to move. But I don't.

And then suddenly, there's a blue light shooting out from the computer and coming straight at me.


	10. Chapter Nine

_AN: Ok, guys, shorter wait, longer part. Hope you like it!_

Chapter Nine

It's dark. It's very dark. Probably because my eyes are closed. I'm going to take a mental inventory before I reveal that I'm awake. It's a military thing. I remember we were waiting for someone to invade or attack, so I might need to keep my consciousness to myself for a while. I methodically check my body, moving as much as I dare so as not to draw attention to myself. Everything seems pretty good, except for the blinding headache, which makes me think I might want to keep my eyes closed for a very long time and a rather disturbing heaviness in my chest which makes me think I'm having a heart attack. I know I'm not exactly the target risk group for such a thing, but the more I think about it, the more I realize I can barely suck in a full breath.

Fear that I'm about to die overrides the fear that I'm being observed by alien hostiles. My eyes open, wildly searching for someone to help. There are a bunch of people buzzing around, but none of them appear to be aliens and none of them appear to be paying any attention to me. I'm not as worried about my impending death anymore. The weight on my chest is much more easily explained by the little boy sound asleep on top of me than by a heart attack. As I sit up, I start to notice the extent of the chaos around me.

First of all, I'm on the floor of the control room. I can't imagine it seemed like a good idea to leave me here to take a nap, so something else that's a much bigger problem must be going on. Hammond is here, shouting his demand to know where the medical team is into the phone. He seems pleased to see me conscious. Probably because that's one less medical team he needs. Daniel and Walter are also sprawled on the floor and both of them are unconscious. I realize Jack's forehead bears an angry red splotch which is starting to blister. Which makes me suddenly aware that parts of my face are burning hot as well - I'm willing to bet from the same sort of burns.

"Major, get that iris closed!" Hammond's order does little to snap me out of my fog. I know Janet will have something to say about my ability to work if I reveal that everything seems to be kind of fuzzy and rather slow.

I'd rather she not find that out, so I pull myself to my feet, barely throwing myself into a chair before I collapse. I don't particularly recall the control room having been located on a Tilt-A-Whirl, but that's certainly what it feels like. I'm trying to be careful of Jack, who I'm now starting to realize is as unconscious as Daniel and Walter. I'm a little more confused and unfocused than I was before as I return to my fight with the computer. Regardless of how I feel, whatever just came through the gate is not going to win. I refuse to let it. Not after hurting my friends.

Mainly by accident, although I'll admit my illogical reasoning skills brought on by the crushing headache might have some effect, I retake control of the iris, getting it to slide closed with a satisfying thud. The rest of the computer can wait until I get something for my head. But just in case, I tell someone who may or may not be invisible to put the base on emergency power to ensure that no one can activate anything for the time being.

I turn around, the slight movement making my head hurt worse. The medical teams have arrived and are pouring over Walter and Daniel. I don't think they even notice the baby in my arms. Janet comes into the room, looking a bit frazzled at the situation. Usually people come through the gate injured; they don't get injured in the control room. Not that it hasn't happened before, admittedly it usually happens to me because I'm always the one trying to deal with the irrational computer when it's not working.

I know Janet's trying to figure out whether Walter or Daniel needs her help more. Finally, I catch her eye. Her mouth drops open at the sight of Jack. I guess she managed to avoid the rumors and the screaming. Lucky her.

"Can you walk, Sam?"

I nod, the sudden movement causing me to close my eyes against the waves of dizziness. "Yeah, I think so." It's not like Janet could carry me and I'm not about to get on a stretcher conscious, so I'll have to.

"Come with me." She reaches for Jack, probably to make sure he doesn't get hurt if I fall.

My arms clutch him. "I've got him." He's hurt and I don't want him to wake up with someone else. And I'm injured and dazed and this may well be the only time I can use Jack as a security blanket. Janet looks at me quizzically, as though she'd argue if I was in a better state of health. But all she does is pull me out of the way as Walter and Daniel get wheeled past us.

The guilt starts piling on by the time we get to the infirmary. It's my fault my friends were harmed. It's my fault Jack was harmed. This sweet little baby trusted me more than anyone else and I let him get hurt. I hug him tighter, growing more concerned by the minute that he's still out. Daniel is still unconscious too, but Daniel's remarkably hard to kill and Walter has started coming around, although I'm fairly certain his vivid descriptions of the dancing zebras in hula skirts might land him in the infirmary for a while.

Janet helps me onto a bed, digging her pen light out immediately. "Ok, Sam, if your head hurts, this isn't going to help."

I turn away. "Can you check on him first?" I maneuver Jack around to face her.

"You're not getting out of this. You lost consciousness."

"But I regained it and he didn't." Normally I wouldn't whine, but it seems perfectly acceptable to me at the moment.

Janet looks skeptical, but bends down to examine the burns on Jack's face anyway. She pries his eyes open one at a time to shine her light in them. "Is this your nephew?" She tickles his feet and my heart soars when he jerks them away from her.

"My nephew is eleven, Jan."

"I thought he was older than this." Janet smiles at Jack. As her fingers move to tickle his belly, Jack wakes up and twists around, trying to refasten himself to my neck. "He certainly does like you. So who is this precious little man?" She's totally taken in by him, I can tell by the stupid grin she's now sporting - the one that matches mine.

I grin as I turn Jack back around to face Janet. I lean down so Jack knows I'm talking to him. "This is my friend Janet." Jack blows her a kiss and I have to laugh even though it hurts my head. Of course he's not shy around her - his ability to avoid medical treatment at any cost is obviously an instinct. "Janet, this is-"

"Colonel O'Neill!" Her eyes widen as she looks at him. "Oh my God! How did this happen?" I open my mouth to respond, but before I can form words, Janet cuts me off. "Did it have something to do with a certain interlude in the ladies room earlier today?"

My face burns with a blush, but at least now it's probably hidden behind real burns. "Janet!" I look around to see if anyone overheard, but no one appears to be listening.

She looks alarmed, suddenly jumping away form the charmer in my lap. "It's not contagious, is it?"

"No. It's a long story that I might tell you sometime when there's lots of alcohol involved, but suffice it to say that it's not contagious."

Jack's apparently done being charming. He starts squirming until I let him face me once again. But rather than snuggling up to me, his face crumbles and he starts whimpering. I'm glad he's not crying because my head hurts so much. But it seems very unlike the temperament I've witnessed so far.

"Jan? What's wrong with him?" I'm not a mother. I have limited experience with kids. I didn't babysit when I was a teenager and most of the time I've spent with kids has been in the presence of their parents. Still, I feel panic setting in at the thought that Jack is hurt and can't articulate what he's feeling short of crying. Tears well in my eyes.

Pen light at the ready, Janet bends over Jack to examine him again. "His pupils look fine." Jack shrieks the minute she nails him with the light and hides his face in my neck again. "Was he with you when he was hurt?"

Just bury me in guilt, why don't you? "Yeah, he was just like this, actually."

"I think he's got the same concussion that you have, but he's honest enough to cry in pain over it." She calls a nurse over and tells her something quietly. "I'm going to give him something for the pain, but I'm assuming you'll refuse anything until you're done working."

"Everything you give me makes me sleepy and I can't sleep until the computers are working again." I look down at Jack, taking in his tiny, sniffling body. "What are you going to give him? Is it safe? Can you give babies pain medicine?"

Janet just laughs. "I am a doctor, Sam." She ruffles Jack's hair. "Don't worry, I won't hurt him."

Ok, I feel like an idiot. But it's not like little Jack came with instructions. Not that big Jack came with instructions either. His arms are loosening their hold on my neck and I can tell he's drifting off to sleep again. "Should he be sleeping like this?"

"Just wake him every hour or so and keep an eye out for anything weird."

"Weird, Janet? He's been physically attached to me since this happened. How would I know what's weird?"

Janet grins and I realize I shouldn't have said that. "I seem to recall him being physically attached to you before this happened."

I glare at my friend, able to abide her teasing since my concussion has re-induced the happy squishy puddle state of my brain. And the references to the kissing aren't hurting either. "Someday we're going to have a little chat about what can and can't be told to Daniel in confidence." I stand up slowly, knowing that moving too quickly will land me on the floor.

"Sam, you don't think you're getting out of the exam, do you?"

Damn. I was hoping the thoughts of me and Jack kissing had given her a happy squishy puddle brain as well. Reluctantly I sit back on the bed. "I really do need to get back to the computers, Jan."

"In a minute."

Janet gives me a rather cursory exam, which I'm very thankful for. She wakes Jack long enough to give him the medicine the nurse brought back. She even checks on Walter and Daniel's conditions, which are fine, except for a good round of burns and concussions for all involved, which are treated easily enough. I let her apply cream to Jack's burns, but refuse it for myself. As much as it hurts, I'd rather suffer than walk around the base with big slimy white patches on my face. She extorts a promise from me to return as soon as the computers are fixed so the staff can keep an eye on me during the night. Then she sends me on my way, although not without sending a nurse with me to make sure I get back to the control room all right.

As I duck through the control room door, I see a technician in my chair, reporting to General Hammond. The computers aren't working, but the base is on emergency power. Invisible man takes orders well, I guess. The tech turns to face the general, cringing when he sees me and Jack and immediately vacating my chair. He bites his lip nervously. "Sir, there appears to be an abnormality in the power usage."

I'd really like to bang my head into the wall, but I know that would hurt far too much. "Let me guess - the MALP room." The tech nods.

General Hammond looks at me, a cross between a wince and wink in his eyes. "Major, you're not going anywhere near it."

I glance down at Jack who is sucking his thumb once again. I smile at the tech. "Have Siler blow it to hell." If only Jack were old enough to appreciate me siding with him for once.

Hammond nods in agreement. "Do it before Dr. Jackson decides to talk to it."

"I'll get back to work on the system, sir." I drop into my chair, rationalizing that if I hurry up and get it fixed then I can sleep sooner.

"Are you and Jack all right?" Hammond's fatherly concern comes through once again and I'm glad for it. I'm not used to him being mean.

"Yes, sir, we'll be fine."

"Good." That's the general I know. Hammond leans over and smiles. Jack's eyes are drooping once again, but he's awake. Amazingly he doesn't recoil in fear. "I wonder if we can keep him this little. He's a lot less trouble than you were."

Luckily, he can't see my blush.


	11. Chapter Ten

_AN: I do appreciate comments, but seriously, if you don't have anything nice to say at all, just keep it to yourself. Silence says it all!_

Chapter Ten

Siler reports back to me ten minutes later with the all-clear. With that news, I'm able to restore the system rather quickly. I do have to mention using back-ups to Hammond, but since the alien invasion, attempted invasion, attack, what have you, already occurred, he isn't upset. He's just happy that mostly everything is repairable and, although four of us will be spending the night in the infirmary, the injuries were relatively minor.

Jack only naps for an hour and I realize belatedly that his crankiness might well have been an overwhelming need for a nap. Even so, he quickly shows signs of utter boredom with what I'm doing, but he seems relatively content with just watching me. I smile at him. At least I know his preoccupation with me is real and completely natural. I guess Daniel was right about us being soul mates, not that I would ever repeat such an unscientific theory to Jack myself.

"Are you bored, John?"

He nods solemnly.

"I still have more work to do. Do you want to go play while I work?" I'm hoping he'll go with Teal'c willingly.

He shakes his head just as solemnly.

"Then you'll just have to be bored until I'm done."

He pouts. It's adorable. Not necessarily more so than when he's fully grown and pouting, but just as much in an entire different way. "I want to play with you."

I turn to Teal'c who is sitting quietly beside me, somehow fascinated by an outdated Air Force manual he found. "Hey, Teal'c?"

Teal'c looks up slowly, as though what he's reading is the most engrossing novel ever. He can barely pull his eyes away long enough to answer me. "Yes, Major Carter?"

"Daniel has some markers in his lab. Can you get them and a notebook for the colonel to play with?" Maybe a Jack isn't as much trouble at 3 as I was, but a bored kid is a bored kid. It's best to amuse them.

Teal'c nods at me, reluctantly laying aside the manual he was reading. When I turn back to Jack, he's staring after Teal'c, trying to imitate Teal'c infamous raised eyebrow. I giggle at him just because I can. He looks back at me, his face breaking into a grin.

I've never been big on kids, really. Kids have wild imaginations, and not quite useful wild imaginations as opposed to my own wild imagination, and I never can quite understand what they ramble on about. I've always been a very efficient, productive member of society, at least since I hit the age of reason, and I only ever imagined that having a child would slow me down. But the adoration in Jack's eyes right now, the way he feels all snuggled up in my arms, well, it makes me want to have a baby of my own. I hug Jack tightly, loving the way his arms squeeze me back.

Teal'c returns, offering the markers and some loose paper to me. "I was unable to locate any bound sources of paper free of Daniel Jackson's notations. I felt it wise to find another source."

"Good idea." Cause Daniel wouldn't have been too upset about Jack drawing all over his irreplaceable notes. Right. And Walter wasn't kidding about the zebras in hula skirts, either.

I settle Jack in another chair, letting him amuse himself while I start running the diagnostics, verifying that everything is functional once again. He draws a series of airplanes, or what he claims are airplanes, and announces that he's going to be a pilot someday. And here I thought I was the only one who knew what I wanted to do for a living when I was three and actually wound up doing it.

"Ok, John, I'm almost done here. We can go play in a minute."

Jack jumps up on his chair. "Yay!"

Daniel's voice sounds behind me. "How did you get permission to leave? Janet's insisting that I stay here for tonight."

I turn to face him, quite amused that he didn't escape the white burn cream, since it's smeared liberally across his face. "I didn't so much get permission as I didn't request it. If I don't come back to sleep in the infirmary tonight Janet will have the whole mountain out looking for me." I watch Daniel's brow furrow and realize he's not listening.

"Are those my markers?" He picks up one of the ones Jack knocked on the floor and pulls off the cap to reveal the smushed in tip. "Sam?"

I glance at Teal'c. He looks at me for a millisecond and then immediately returns to his manual. I shrug. "I don't know where there came from." Cause I'm technically not sure where they were in his office so it's not exactly a lie. Unfortunately, I'm not so good at intentionally misleading people.

"I use them to accurately depict artifacts and structures that we can't move or that don't photograph well. It's an important part of my reference material."

"Danny, you're whining."

"I have a head injury."

"So do I. I'll buy you new markers. Have a seat." He's starting to look a little unsteady on his feet, but I figure it has a lot to do with the way he keeps bending down to pick up the abandoned markers one at a time.

He does a quick survey. "Where?"

Sure enough, there are no available seats. I'm about to suggest that he take mine since I'm planning on leaving, but Jack jumps down from his chair and looks at Daniel.

"Sit here." We're all dumbfounded as Jack scampers up onto my lap once again. He shoves his latest scribble at me. "I made this for you!"

I can't even ooh and ahh over the artistic masterpiece. I'm too impressed by his recent foray into selflessness. "John, that was very nice of you to give Daniel your chair."

Jack surprises me once again by turning and reaching out for Daniel. Also stunned, Daniel lets a suddenly affectionate Jack hug him. "Thank you, Danny."

Daniel looks up at me. I shrug. Must be the head injury. He looks back at Jack. "For what?"

"You saved Sam." Jack reaches for me again and I'm glad for it. I don't like the jealousy that flared up at the thought of being replaced.

Daniel looks as confused as I feel and we both silently turn to Teal'c. Teal'c doesn't even have to look up to know we're expecting an answer from him. "Daniel Jackson pushed Major Carter and young O'Neill out of the way during the attack."

I check with Jack who nods emphatically. "Then by all means, thank you, Daniel." That goes a long way toward explaining why Jack and I weren't hurt as badly. I glance at the computer screen, which is reporting the success of the last test I ran. "With that said, boys, Jack and I are leaving."

Jack slides to the ground while I collect my papers and his drawings. He's already at the door to the hallway, chomping at the bit to have some fun. I'm eager myself, but the massive headache keeps me from bouncing the way Jack is.

"Not so fast, Major." Hammond's voice wafts down the stairs in advance of his body.

I grimace at Jack whose sad face is watching his now least-favorite person on Earth approach us. I think I could cry.

"I'd like to have the members of SG-1 upstairs for a short debriefing relating to today's events."

I really want to say something smart and rude and sarcastic, but nothing comes to mind. I simply smile. "Yes, sir."

Jack stomps his foot, plants his hands on his hips, and stares at the general. "Oh for crying out loud!"


	12. Chapter Eleven

_AN: This got much longer than I intended, but hey, it's Friday, right? Please let me know if you like it!_

Chapter Eleven

Let me assure you, it's been a long time since I squealed with delight about anything. But I do. I can't resist. He's just so damn cute. The squeal is followed by giggling - so much giggling that I have tears in my eyes and can barely breathe. Everyone else in the room is having pretty much the same reaction. This proves it: Jack is officially the cutest kid ever.

We trail, snickering, up the stairs after General Hammond. I reach for Jack to lift him, but he's still mad over the meeting. He pouts at me. Adorable as all hell, I tell you.

"Come on, John. I promise it won't be long."

His eyes are narrowed and his expression looks very much like his older self. As much as I like little Jack, I miss big Jack. "Cross your heart?"

I grin. That's so not something big Jack would say. I'm pretty sure little Jack could conquer the world with his charm. "Absolutely."

He regards me for a long moment. "Ok." But rather than reaching for me to carry him, he starts up the stairs on his own.

It should be said that the steps are so high on him that they nearly reach his knees. He doesn't have the strength to climb that high with one leg, so he has to lean forward and pull himself with his arms. Then he stands up, triumphant in his achievement. One step down, way too many to go. He repeats the whole process on the next step, attempting each it and failing before he uses his arms again.

Four steps later, General Hammond appears on the landing. "Major? Today please."

I look up with a pained smile. "He can do it himself, sir. We are coming."

"Do you think you could hurry it along?"

With a quiet sigh, I reach for Jack. I get him about an inch above the ground before he starts wailing. "I can do it myself!"

The general doesn't look impressed. So I set Jack down and look him straight in the eye. "I know you can do it yourself, but it's much faster if I carry you and the sooner we get upstairs the sooner we can go play."

Jack considers his options carefully, but in the end, in typical Jack fashion, outright obstinacy wins out. "I said I can do it myself."

I don't particularly like the notion of upsetting either Jack or Hammond, but Jack probably can handle the stairs alone and General Hammond could, if I were to push him, refuse to let us leave the base tonight. "All right, John. Knock yourself out." I walk past him, taking the steps two at a time. I sit down at the conference table, closing my eyes and rubbing my temples in the hopes the throbbing headache will ease up. I probably shouldn't have run up the stairs like that.

General Hammond shuffles some reports. "I'll make this quick. I know we're all desperate to have this day be over with."

"SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!"

I guess Jack just noticed that I'm out of his line of sight. I glance at the general for no particular reason. I don't care what he says, I'm not about to have Jack screaming my name again and not do something about it again. Hammond looks tired. Between losing Jack and shrinking Jack and the alien attack, I think we've all had about as much as we can take. I go back to the stairs and lean over the railing. His wail stops as soon as he sees me.

"Do you want to come up here with me?" I watch as he nods, tears wet on his chubby cheeks. "Then you'll have to let me carry you." He nods again, stretching his arms up to me. I descend and re-ascend the steps slowly this time to ward off a worse headache. Jack's pathetic foray into independence is quashed and he snuggled back into my arms. I listen to his soft breathing as he sucks his thumb. I don't think I've ever been so content. I love the way this feels.

And then suddenly, Daniel, Teal'c and General Hammond are getting up from the table. I look around, confused as to the point of the meeting or lack thereof. I can see General Hammond through the glass - he's already back in his office, putting his coat on. Teal'c is gone by the time I look back. Daniel is smirking.

"Have a nice nap?"

There's the blush again. It's been a whole hour since I blushed; I was starting to forget what it felt like to be perpetually embarrassed. I've never fallen asleep in a meeting no matter how tired or bored I was. "You're kidding."

Daniel shakes his head. I know I'm not going to enjoy whatever has him grinning. "You looked so content and snuggly with Jack there. I guess you have to settle for what you can get, right?"

I glance at Hammond's office to make sure he's long gone. My face has turned an even deeper shade of red. I can't come up with a good retort. I'm still half asleep. "I'll blame that crack on the head injury, Daniel." My voice holds a warning tone - it's bad enough if he wants to tease me in private, but he needs to watch it when we're on the base.

"I'll see you later. I'm going to try to get some work done before Janet catches me." With that, he leaves.

I look at Jack who's once again staring at me. "I think we might actually get to the having fun now."

Jack looks at me in all seriousness, popping his thumb out of his mouth long enough to answer me. "Finally."

It's so Jack that I have to laugh. I guess the attitude is as much a part of him as his attachment to me. I take advantage of his current age as the perfect excuse. "I love you."

He grins as he leans forward to kiss my cheek. "I love you too."

"You'd better." I tickle him as we head for the elevator. I'm getting off this base before anyone catches me. We get all the way to the car before I realize I can't drive around with a three year old loose in the car. I remember Jack's truck had a child seat in it, so I have to go back in. I'm sure his keys are in his locker. I'm sure he'll probably want to know how I know his locker combination at some point, but I'll have to deal with that later. As I dig out his keys, I notice the clothes tossed in the bottom. They're the ones I wore when I was shrunk. They're still all muddy, but I seriously consider putting them on Jack.

In the end, I just can't bring myself to dress him in a pink t-shirt and jeans with pink flower appliqués. That would be wrong. Hell, I'm still burned up over the fact that someone put me - the biggest tomboy of all time - in them.

So I have to find another solution. Solutions are my thing anyway. I think it over while I strap Jack in the car seat and dodge the odd looks from the boys at the gate. I'm going to have to buy him some clothes. And I should probably buy him something decent to eat at well since that cake isn't going to hold either of us for much longer. I pull into the first shopping center I see with a department store. I find my way to the kids department easily enough, but that's where I stop. I actually have no clue what size to buy. I don't want to be too obvious about it for fear that someone will wonder if I kidnapped Jack or someone will notice that he's only wearing a t-shirt. I stare at rack after rack of choices with what I'm sure is an absolutely baffled expression. My headache is getting worse at the sheer volume of choices before me.

"He's three and a half, isn't he?" I look up startled at the salesgirl. She looks about three and a half herself.

"Yeah."

"My son's his age. He's just growing like a weed!"

She has a son? Do her parents know? I think I'm getting old because I can't believe this girl is old enough to have a baby - or a job really. But I see a gold ring on her finger and shake my head in amazement. Maybe I've been locked in that mountain too long. I glance at Jack and then back at the girl. "The stuff he was wearing this morning doesn't exactly fit anymore." Entirely true. I'd pat myself on the back if my arms weren't full of three year old.

"There are some great sets over here. They're a little long, but they've got elastic in the waist so he can grow into them. And they also have a stain resis-"

I tune out as I follow Miss Perky to the rack. "Great. I'll take one."

"Trains or bikes?" Miss Perky lifts up two outfits; one features a train on the shirt and the other has a motorcycle.

I grin at Jack. "Bike." I pull out my wallet to signal that I'm not interested in shopping anymore.

Miss Perky leads me to the register, yapping happily about how we should get the boys together sometime to play. I don't imagine I'd be interested even if I did have a kid. I smile at her in as close to a friendly smile as I can while her chatter grates on my nerves.

"We're running late, so I've got to run. It was so nice talking to you." I don't give her a chance to say anything else. I grab the bag and run. I don't even stop when Jack spots a giant stuffed dog and starts asking if he can have it.

I take Jack back to the car long enough for him to put on his new clothes. Then we hit the grocery store for Fruit Loops and milk. It's got vitamins in it, so it's healthy enough for now, and since I can't cook, it's probably the best he's going to get in my care. Jack's getting anxious because he's still not seeing the fun in running errands, except for some toy cars that he spots which I won't stop long enough to buy. I'm doing my best race walking to get back to the car so we can actually get to the park before it's too dark to play and I have to take him back to the base.

"Puppy!" His shriek is so loud that I stop dead in my tracks.

That did not help my headache one iota. I turn to look in the direction of Jack's pointed finger, unable to resist anything that has him so excited. He's bouncing in my arms, reaching with both hands for the puppies in the pet store window. Oh, I should have seen this coming. But since I have no children, I couldn't possibly have been expected to foresee the danger in passing a pet store. Of course, the pet store is closer than the park and, by the looks of it, more fun.

I lower Jack to the ground and watch as he presses his face to the glass. One of the puppies comes over to him and licks the window. Jack giggles and I open the door for him to dart in. I stand behind him as he stares mesmerized by the dogs. They are cute, but there's no chance in hell I can take care of a dog with my life.

After twenty minutes of Jack talking to the puppies, a pimple-faced teenage boy comes over. "Would you like to see one of them?"

I shake my head. "We're just looking around for now."

Jack turns on me, his eyes already filling with tears. "I wanna see puppy!"

I cannot deal with more tears. "Yeah, ok, can he pet one of them?"

The boy lifts one yipping, excited puppy out of the cage and sets it in front of Jack. Immediately, it jumps up, landing its front paws on Jack and knocking him to the floor. Jack starts howling and the puppy scampers off with the boy in tow.

Jack unsteadily climbs to his feet and runs back to me, hugging my knees and crying. Apparently, he wants to see another puppy. I spy a smaller cage against the far wall and coax Jack into looking at that one instead. Chihuahuas are not quite as frightening to children. Jack is enthralled. The other puppies were as big as him, but the Chihuahua puppy is small enough for Jack to hold, if I help him not squish the puppy's guts.

After another twenty minutes, I've about had it with the sights, sounds, and smells of the pet store. "Oh, John, time to go."

Jack looks up at me with a huge smile. "Kay." He starts toward the door with the miniature dog in his hands.

"John, the puppy has to stay here so someone can give him a good home."

Jack's face fills with horror. "No!"

"Yes." I know it's silly to think I can reason with baby Jack. I can barely reason with big Jack and that's only when he's in a good mood.

"Mine!"

"No."

He stomps his foot, the mere act of which causes him to lose his hold on the dog. Seeing its chance at freedom, the dog runs away. Jack turns back to me, somehow believing I had something to do with it. He draws in a deep breath and then opens his mouth and out comes that loudest, longest, sharpest scream I've ever heard in my life.

In that moment of deafening, blinding pain, I realize something very important. Jack is not my child. If he wants a dog, it's not in any way going to be my responsibility following this shrunken interlude. And Jack has, on many occasions, mentioned getting a dog.

I'm good at solutions, remember? And buying the dog will solve two problems - it will stop the screaming and it will help Jack make a decision he's been toying with for years. I smile at Jack. "Ok, let's get the dog."

Jack stops screaming with his mouth wide open. I don't think he was expecting my change of heart.

"Are you sure you want this one?" Cause really, I don't think a Chihuahua was what Jack had in mind. Jack nods. I don't think buying one of the Irish setter puppies that knocked him down would be a good idea, but I'm leery of this choice. "What about a nice beagle? I think you'd like a beagle." I could see Jack with a trusty beagle.

Nope. Jack wants the Chihuahua.

I squat down, grasp his shoulders and look him straight in the eye. "You just make sure you remember that you wanted a Chihuahua and there was nothing I could do to talk you out of it."

Jack grins. "Yay!"

Just as the salesboy returns with the escapee, I tell him that we're taking the dog. I tell him we need all the accoutrements that new dog owners need. As I'm filling out the paperwork to assure them that I'm over eighteen, I decide to nip any future problems relating to dog ownership in the bud and fill in Jack's name as the owner. The boy looks at the paperwork curiously.

"It's going to be his dog. That's ok, right?"

He nods. "I'll just need your signature on the parent line."

I look at Jack, who is sitting on the counter with a squeaky toy in his hands. "You have to take care of him, ok?"

Jack nods happily. "What's his name?"

"He's your dog, John. You have to name him."

The boy hands me all the paperwork and the bags. He offers the barking box containing one hyperactive Chihuahua to Jack. "Here's your puppy!"

Jack looks at the boy. "What's your name?"

The boy smiles and points at his nametag. "Pete."

Oh God. Not good.

Jack turns back to me. "I want to name him Pete."

Once again, I stare him straight in the eye. "You just remember that was your idea too."


	13. Chapter Twelve

_AN: There's probably only one more part after this! Tell me if you like it!_

Chapter Twelve

Originally my plan had been to take Jack to the park and then to my house for a while until it was late enough that I could go back to the infirmary to sleep. Or maybe, possibly, accidentally fall asleep in my own bed and forget entirely about that whole sleeping in the infirmary thing. But the addition of Pete changes it all. No way is that unhousebroken puppy getting anywhere near my house or my beautiful hardwood floors.

I load Jack into the truck and then put Pete, or the box containing Pete, in the front. I stretch the seatbelt around the box to keep it in place. Immediately, Jack starts whining about wanting Pete with him.

"Look, John, I just spent a whole lot of money on Pete here and I'm not going to have him running loose in the truck where he's liable to get hurt. And I refuse to be faced with explaining it to you if Pete has an accident in your truck."

Jack looks duly confused by my statement, but then his expression changes to worry. "Will Pete be scared all by himself in the box? I don't want him to be scared."

I ruffle Jack's messy hair and smile, his charm reminding me why I can't ever say no to him. "Are you scared in the backseat all by yourself?"

He shakes his head resolutely. "I'm a big boy!"

I laugh, thinking of how he can't go anywhere without screaming for me. "Pete's a big boy too. He'll be just fine." I climb in and start the truck, noticing that Pete seems abnormally quiet. I have to check on him. Pete is huddled against the side of the box, his big black eyes open wide. He's shaking in fear. I reach in to pat his head and he ducks. But as soon as I gently touch the top of his head, his eyes close. Poor thing. This world was not made for tiny little dogs.

We're almost to the park - a twenty minute ride filled with nonsensical ramblings about puppies and the occasional yip of agreement from Pete - when Jack stops yammering to himself. "Sam?"

"Yeah?" I glance at him in the rearview mirror. "What's up?"

He looks puzzled. "Where's my mommy and daddy?"

Now that's a good question because I actually have no clue. Jack never talks about his parents. "Probably at home in Minnesota I imagine." He's never mentioned that they died, so I can only assume they're still alive. Come to think of it, I'd really, really like to meet them. I grin to myself at the thought - considering the recent developments, at least the recent developments prior to baby Jack, would indicate that I actually stand a chance of meeting them someday. I wonder if they'll like me - or if it's an O'Neill thing to dislike scientists.

Jack seems satisfied by my answer, although the idea of Minnesota is probably beyond his grasp. At three, locations usually consist of home and grandma's. And in my case, outer space, but then again, I was just a wee bit odd as a child. Actually, I still am.

A minute later, he pipes up again. "Sam?"

"Yes, John?"

"Daddy calls me John and mommy calls me Jack."

I giggle. "I guess I know who won that argument."

"Will you be my mommy?"

In a room full of people, his question would be exceptionally embarrassing for both of us. But since we're alone, it's just sweet. So I smile back at him. "How about if I promise I will never, ever leave you? Is that ok?" Because it is so not motherly love that I feel for Jack.

Jack smiles happily. "Ok!"

When we get to the park, I free Jack from the car seat and dig through the bag from the pet store. Jack climbs into my lap while I put Pete's collar on him - I swear his neck is smaller around than my wrist. Eventually, I turn Jack and Pete loose, after an internal crisis as to just how tight dog collars are supposed to be. I don't want to strangle him, but I don't think there will be any consoling Jack if Pete runs away.

I watch from a bench as Jack leads Pete around. He's babbling happily at no one in particular about all things doggy and Pete seems content enough to scramble around behind him. Until Pete encounters a discarded coffee cup lying in the grass. The wind is blowing just enough to make the cup rock slightly. Pete interprets the gentle movement to be a challenge. He stands there and yips ferociously - as ferocious as yipping can be, I guess - at it for a long time. The coffee cup does not back down; neither does Pete.

Jack is trying to keep moving, tugging at poor little Pete's collar. "Sam!"

Ok, so I actually find it completely adorable and sweet and amusing when big Jack whines. But that's because he only does it when he's in a good mood and teasing me and his voice is so damn sexy that I don't really care what he's saying. But at the moment, there is only little Jack and he might as well be any three year old whining and I'm astonishingly not charmed by it. I scoop Pete up and bring him back to my bench, rescuing Pete from certain defeat in the face of insurmountable coffee cup-dom and freeing Jack to run around. Pete is obviously exhausted from his constant state of panic and curls up happily in my lap.

Jack is playing on the jungle gym, nearly giving me several heart attacks every time he comes perilously close to breaking his neck. But in typical Jack fashion, he saves himself and pretends it was no big deal.

Pete wakes up from his nap and stares at me with his huge eyes which encompass nearly all of his face. I think he's trying to decide if I'm a predator. Relative to a coffee cup, I must look pretty terrifying. I pat him on the head and he blinks at me. There's something familiar about his face - the big black eyes, the tiny little mouth, his twig-like legs, his pathetically miniature body, the inverted triangular head. I'm fairly certain the Chihuahuas are the genetic precursors to the Asgard.

I hold Pete up close to my face and stare into his eyes. "Are you super smart, Pete?"

He blinks at me. Maybe he's telekinetic.

"Honestly, I've got issues with this whole calling you Pete thing. Can I call you Thor?"

He blinks again.

"Sam?"

I look up to discover Jack staring at me curiously. And here I am, blushing furiously. I really shouldn't be embarrassed in front of a three year old, but since I retained all the memories from being three, I fear Jack might too and there's no way in hell Jack will let me live down the fact that I was just talking to a dog. I smile. "What?"

"Are you talking to Pete?"

I lean down until I'm face to face. "He told me his name is Thor."

Jack scrunches up his nose. "Tor?"

I chuckle. "That could work too, actually."

Jack leans forward to stare at Thor. "Dogs can't talk, Sam."

I grin. "Ask Daniel. He's had conversations with dogs."

Jack crawls up onto the bench and then into my lap. He pats Thor on the head. "Ok, Tor." He snuggles back into my neck. "I'm hungry."

Grinning, I scoop up Jack and Thor and head back for the truck. General Hammond was right - Jack is much easier to deal with when he's three.


	14. Chapter Thirteen

_AN: Ok, there will be a short epilogue following this. Thanks for sticking with me!_

Chapter Thirteen

About a block from the park, I come to a stop sign. Straight will take me to the base. Left will take me home. I really, really don't want to go to the base. I take the left, deciding I can confine Thor to the bathroom where he can't ruin my floors. Besides, I have a box of Fruit Loops that will go stale long before I eat them all myself.

I set Thor down on the bathroom floor, watching him for a moment to make sure he'll be ok. He immediately starts chewing on the bath mat, so I need a new plan. Easy enough - I'll put him in the bathtub. The sides are too high for him to escape and it'll actually be even easier to clean. I shush Jack's worried inquiries as to how boring it will be for Thor. I'm sure he can solve world peace and contemplate the great mysteries of life or something if he gets over his irrational fear of the spigot.

Jack, with the help of three thick physics textbooks, is able to sit at the table with me to enjoy our dinner. I snicker as he eats, trying to shove heaping spoonfuls of cereal in his mouth and missing. He never outgrew that charming habit. Jack finishes off two bowls and asks for a third, but even I can't sit still from all the sugar, so I won't let him have it. He's disappointed, but he apparently hasn't fully grasped the power of the temper tantrum yet. We settle on the couch; him glued to cartoons, me with my laptop and a pile of notes I never got around to typing up.

It's almost nine when Jack asks me to turn off the cartoons. I'm quick to oblige because they're driving me nuts. It seems like a respectable hour for a kid to go to sleep, but Jack doesn't look tired and I'm not about to have a battle with him over bedtime. It's not like I go to sleep before the wee hours and Jack's not bothering me, so I don't care how late he stays up.

He crawls into my lap and smirks at me as I try to lift him off the keyboard. "I'm bored."

"You could go check on Thor."

"Kay!" He scrambles off me and tears down the all, leaving me to reconstruct we he inadvertently deleted when he climbed on the laptop. Checking on Thor keeps him busy for a half hour. When he comes back, he's moving slower and yawning. The sugar wore off. He climbs up on the couch with me, his droopy eyes barely staying open.

"I think it's time for bed, buddy."

He looks up at me, momentarily shocked awake. "But I'm not-" His words are cut off by a big yawn. "Tired."

I grin. He's just so cute. I'm definitely going to have a little chat with him when he's back to normal. I want one of these to keep. "How about if I read to you?" Luckily, I still have a Christmas gift that I never got around to sending to my nephew. I haven't even had a chance to wrap it.

Jack snuggles into my side as I start to read. I don't even get to the third page before he's sound asleep. I carefully shift him over until he's lying down. His mussed hair is, as always, standing up at all angles. I have to touch it, to smooth it back from his face. I do miss regular Jack, but this is nice. I finally have a chance to take care of him, to protect him. This is the real Jack, the one before all the pain and loss and dark past. This is the sweet, loving person he was supposed to be, would have been, if things had been different. Of course, if things had been different, I never would have met him, but it would be my loss rather than his because he would have been better off.

I'm actually tired myself, which isn't surprising considering the day I've had. I'm not sure what to do with Jack. He looks comfortable right where he is, but he might be scared if he wakes up by himself. I reach for him, planning on carrying him to my room, but his eyes pop right open. Just like Jack to be a light sleeper. I shush him back to sleep and he dutifully closes his eyes. I think I should leave him on the couch and let him rest.

I leave the lights on, knowing it's pretty much instinctive for three year olds to dislike the dark. He's sound asleep once again. He has always looked so sweet and innocent when he's sleeping. I take advantage of the opportunity to press a kiss onto his forehead. I've always wanted to do that. My face breaks into a grin as I crawl into my bed, realizing that because of this afternoon's discussion, I can kiss Jack whenever I want. The thought squashes the twinge of guilt I feel for skipping out on Janet.

It's a little after two when I wake up. My door is standing open like I left it, specifically so I could hear Jack if he needs me. I don't hear anything now, but I figure that must have been what woke me. I go out to the living room to check on him.

My heart stops when I see the empty couch. My mind is racing. There is so much, so very much, dangerous stuff that a baby could get into in my house - included a handgun that I completely forgot about in the kitchen drawer. It's a terrible, guilty fear that sends me there first, immediately locating the gun. Thank God. Now I know that he didn't find that, I scour the room, checking for any signs he hurt himself on anything else. I try every room, panic overwhelming me when I can't find him. My last stop is the bathroom, the panic and sleep-induced haze having erased the existence of Thor from my mind.

I breathe a huge sigh of relief when my eyes fall on Jack. He's curled up asleep in the tub with Thor. Thor is huddled as far away as he can be, shaking in his typically frightened way. I pat Thor on the head and scoop Jack up into my arms. His eyes blink open sleepily. I'm expecting him to tell me that Thor was scared.

But he hugs me tight and tells me something I never expected Jack to admit, regardless of his age. "I was scared."

I squeeze him back. "Why didn't you wake me?"

He looks at me, tears welling in his eyes. "I didn't know where you were." He starts crying in earnest and I know I have no choice. Besides, I distinctly remember him crawling into bed with me when I was shrunk and he was afraid of a thunderstorm.

I smooth his hair and shush him again. "Do you want to sleep in my bed?"

He nods and sniffles disconsolately. I feel awful - like I've traumatized him beyond repair. But he seems content enough when I settle him in my bed. I turn out the light and he snuggles against me. I smile happily. I had every intention of having Jack in my bed tonight, so while this is not what I had in mind, at least I wasn't wrong. And we all know how very important it is to my psyche that I'm right.

Normally, I pop right out of bed in the morning. It's not that I'm particularly eager, nor irritatingly chipper as Jack as accused on more than one occasion, it's just that home - my house - isn't really relaxing to me. There's nothing wrong with it per se, but home is much better defined for me as the people around me. There are no people at my house. I feel more at home at a briefing with my teammates and General Hammond at my side.

Today, however, I feel no nagging compulsion to race to work to see my family. None whatsoever. I'm warm and comfortable and snuggled quite close to Jack. Several hours of yesterday were spent with Jack nuzzling my neck, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised that he's at it again. Of course, yesterday when Jack was nuzzling my neck, his short little legs were barely long enough to reach my waist. At the moment, his legs are tangled with mine and his now considerable weight pressing onto me is enough to make it hard to breathe.

Ok, honestly, what he's doing with his mouth at the moment might well have something to do with why I can't breathe, I'll give you that.

As much as I liked baby Jack, I'm so very, very glad he's grown up once again. And he seems to be enjoying it as well.

He pulls back, smiling his confident, cocky, conceited, well-deserved grin. "Are you up yet, sleepyhead?"

I feel him shift against me and I giggle. "You certainly are."

"Do you always lure little boys to you bed?"

I raise my eyebrows at him. "Do you always try to sleep in bathtubs?" He obviously doesn't have an answer for me since he immediately starts kissing me again.

He's tugging at my shirt, trying to get it off me without removing his lips from mine, when I realize he's wearing normal clothes. I break the kiss long enough to help him with my shirt and ask about his attire. "You weren't wearing that last night, Jack."

He looks sheepish. "No, I had a change of clothes in the truck." He leans down to kiss me again. "I hope none of your neighbors were up at four."

With our collective effort, the rest of our clothes quickly wind up in a messy heap on the floor. Just as things are starting to get interesting, the phone rings. I groan as I glance at the clock. It's a little after seven.

"That's probably Janet. She just got in and realized I never came back and she's going to yell at me."

Jack grins at me; his eyes dancing happily. "Don't answer that." Then he winks. "That's an order."

I laugh as I pull his lips to mine. "Yes, sir."


	15. Epilogue

Epilogue

Jack and I get plenty of strange, curious stares as we walk into the base. I tell myself it's because Jack was three yesterday. I tell myself it's because I stay on base most nights anymore. I tell myself it's because of the Chihuahua that Jack flat out ordered me to carry since he's refusing to admit it's his.

I mean, they aren't staring because Jack and I arrived together this morning. They aren't staring because someone saw that one last kiss Jack couldn't resist in the truck. They aren't staring because Jack and I have a distinctly happy glow about us. They can't possibly know. Can they?

We take our typical places at the conference table next to each other. Daniel and Janet are already there. Both of them look particularly angry - undoubtedly because of my little disappearing act. Daniel has more burn cream smeared on his face, which only make me happier that I ditched last night. Janet looks angrier than I've ever seen here. I scoot my chair closer to Jack's, knowing he'll protect me - or at least accept the blame. I set Thor on the table, hoping his adorable face will deflect some of the anger. If nothing else, Thor's presence will distract the attention from me.

Daniel takes the bait and I smirk. "What is that?"

Jack's keeping a straight face, although I don't know how. "Daniel, that's a dog."

Daniel looks puzzled, as though he was afraid of that exact answer. "Why is it here?"

Jack glances at me and grins, but the grin is gone when he looks back at Daniel. "There's a bit of a custody dispute that needs to be resolved."

I can't resist and I'm pretty sure that was the point of his comment. "There's no custody dispute. He's yours."

"You bought him."

"You were having a temper tantrum."

"I'll have another one if you try to make me keep that rat."

Daniel joins in, probably quite thoroughly enjoying our exchange. "I thought it was a dog."

General Hammond comes in, taking his place at the head of the table and somehow completely missing the dog. Not that Thor really stands out amid the mugs and books and such on the surface. He is the same color and rather small. Hammond's glance immediately rivets on Jack. "Glad you're feeling more like yourself, Colonel."

"Yes, sir, so am I." Jack gives no indication that he remembers anything, saving both of us the embarrassment. "I can only hope I was less troublesome than Carter was."

His attempt to embarrass me falls flat. See, after yesterday, I'm an old pro at being publicly humiliated. The joke doesn't even make me blush.

The general forces a tight smile. "That's debatable. You may have caused less trouble, but you also caused more headaches.

Jack continues with the dumb act, despite my repeated attempts to silence him by kicking him under the table. "Headaches, sir?"

Hammond smiles and I think he's taking great pride in mortifying Jack. "You screamed continuously for the major every time she was out of your sight."

Apparently Jack's not immune to humiliation because his cheeks flame red. I grin, but I try to fight it back. There's no use in calling attention to myself. Jack ducks his face down, forfeiting any further argument.

Hammond smiles and looks at the papers in his hands. "First things first. Would someone like to tell me why there's a dog in here?"

"It's his." My hand immediately points at Jack.

So much for loyalty. Jack's pointing right back at me.

Teal'c, who has been silent until this point, leans forward, closely inspecting Thor. Thor, pathetic, scaredy-cat that he is, looks at Teal'c and licks his nose. Teal'c continues to stare at him. "What is this creature's name?"

Jack and I look at each other and shrug. Thor is terrified of both of us and neither of us really wants to claim ownership, so it might be for the best that Thor and Teal'c bond. I smile at Teal'c. "That creature is named Thor."

Teal'c sits up immediately, nodding reverently at Thor. "I see the problems with your cloning technology have yet to be resolved."

Jack has to correct him because I'm too busy laughing at the fact that Jack is now the only one of the four of us who has not endeavored to converse with a dog. "T, she named him after Thor, but he's not actually Thor."

Teal'c nods before he leans forward again to inspect Thor. "Is this creature a dog or a rat?"

General Hammond clears his throat. "It is a dog, Teal'c. And if someone does not claim ownership right now, the dog is going to be sent to the pound."

Jack and I answer in unison. "Not it."

Teal'c turns to Daniel. "Is the pound an unfavorable location for a dog?" Daniel grimaces and glares at Jack and I. Both Teal'c and Daniel are obviously displeased at our irresponsible pet ownership. Teal'c reaches out, lifting the tiny dog in one of his massive hands. "This creature belongs to me, General Hammond. I will see to its care."

The meeting degenerates from there, despite the general's best efforts to keep us focused. Janet has very little to say - I'm pretty sure she's just there to let us know she's angry. Teal'c takes advantage of every lapse in conversation to inquire as to what caring for Thor will require. Daniel is obsessed with trying to figure out why the effects of the drug lasted so much longer on me. Jack and I try various reasons to get him to change the subject. We blame it on our relative sizes, differences in our metabolism, the amount of substance, even the number of years it had to erase.

But Daniel isn't dissuaded and eventually, Hammond remembers he never found out who was to blame for it.

Although we haven't discussed it, Jack shoots me a subtle glance that lets me know he's well aware of how it happened. But being the gentleman that he is, he takes the blame. "There was a little mix-up with my hot sauce. The containers looked the same."

The general stares at both of us for a good long time and I swear there's a twinkle in his eyes that reveals his observance of that happy glow Jack and I are sporting. But he nods, accepting the explanation and not venturing further.

Janet, who's spent all this time with her arms folded across her chest and glaring at us, suddenly pipes up. "What on Earth could have had you so distracted that you made a mistake like that, Colonel?" Her words sound innocent, but Jack and I know they're not.

He turns to me, panic written all over his face. "Actually, it was Carter who mixed it up."

My mouth drops open in shock. I can't believe he ratted on me. In a completely uncharacteristic move, I reach out and slug him in the arm.

It's the first time I've dared to do anything so unprofessional in public in all the years I've know him. His lips curve up in a hint of a smirk and he raises an eyebrow at me. "Yes, Carter, whatever could you have been thinking about to make you so distracted?"

All eyes in the room turn to me.

I feel it creeping up once and again and realize that I will never, ever be immune to embarrassment.

_AN: Ok, guys, that's it! Thanks for reading. Comments are appreciated!_


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